Safe Haven Trade Died of COVID
It’s my unfortunate duty to inform the choir here that Joe Bonds and his wife Josephine Gold, also known as the Safe Havens, have died from allergic reactions to the COVID vaccine.
They protected our money in the darkest of times only to be cast aside during the recent market orgy for the town slut, Jo Jo Bitcoin.
As an ordained minister of markets, I say shame on all you stock-swapping-greatest-fools. Your portfolios shall repent now or perish! The safe haven trade will be born again in the ashes of your covet-thy-neighbor greed.
Let the Market Heaven rain down upon ye snake-speaking-stock-sinners and for the golden angels of Man’s true nature rise up in all their glory!