Preparing as a Woman for the Crash

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soulsurfersteph's picture
soulsurfersteph
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Preparing as a Woman for the Crash

Namaste,

I am new here and did a search and did not find a topic covering this...apologies if it has already been covered.

I follow a lot of econobloggers and find that most of the forums are dominated by men it seems. There do seem to be more men preparing for the crash than women. As a single woman who lives in a big city, I am a bit concerned as to what to do to prepare myself.

In some respects I am fortunate that I have no children. I am also relatively strong and walk a lot, so fitness-wise I am prepared. But I am also considering taking up martial arts again. Should I also be looking into getting a gun?

The second part of my question/comment is that when I talk to female friends about this issue they don't seem to take it very seriously. Somehow our culture has brainwashed women into thinking economics is not an interesting subject. I would be interested to know if there are any FEMALE leaders out there writing or speaking about this issue.

Thank you for your feedback and advice.

Stephanie

 

 

cmartenson's picture
cmartenson
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Re: Preparing as a Woman for the Crash

Stephanie,

I thoroughly understand your sense of isolation - lots of people feel the same thing - but I've not yet noted an unbalanced  gender split on the subject.  At least at the seminars my wife and I hold the audience is almost always nearly a perfect 50/50.

Which surprised me for a while because my intuition said that this would be a male-dominated arena.  You know, the whole "provide and protect" thing.

Here at the site there are lots of women involved, although with the anonymity it is not always easy to tell who is who doing the posting.

I would suggest that your sense of isolation has less to do with your friends being female and more to do with their particular views at this time. 

So stick around, enjoy the company, and you'll find this is the best place to have a safe, comfortable experience as you process some very intense ideas and emotions.

Amanda V's picture
Amanda V
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Re: Preparing as a Woman for the Crash

Hi Stephanie.

I am a woman so I will respond.  I honestly don't see it makes any difference whether you are a man or a woman in preparation.

If you live alone, as a man or a woman, you may wish to think about personal security.  And how you do that is a personal question.  Some buy a gun.  Others begin building community.  And there are a thousand other ways. Here is a thread about not needing guns.

http://www.peakprosperity.com/forum/alternatives-gun-arsenal-post-peak-america/12588

About getting through to female friends:  Getting through to anybody is not easy so I don't think it is a function of them being female.   It is a major problem for a lot of people here and it has been discussed frequently.  You are at the beginning stages of a journey all of us here have gone down.  

I have never had any education in economics, politics, finance etc.  But I took it upon myself to listen carefully when I discovered CM's crash course.  Till then I didn't have any idea that all money was loaned in to existence, what fractional reserve banking was, or anything.  I took on board the basic principles and ran with it - even if some of the details were a bit blurry.  Since then I have kept revisiting it.  So, I think CM's material is a good place to start with your friends and, if the full crash course is too long I would strongly suggest inviting them around one evening and watching the 45 minute version.  You need a carrot - such as wine and cheese.

http://www.peakprosperity.com/blog/crash-course-45-minutes-or-less/30440

I don't think it would matter if it was a female "leader" presenting the information.  It is pretty tough grappling with the information regardless.

BTW I find there are a lot of women here on CM, but as Chris says its hard to tell from user names.  You eventually figure it out as you end up reading a post where it becomes obvious. 

Am off to get some links for you to paste them in here ....

http://www.peakprosperity.com/forum/depression-and-marriage-problems-taking-red-pill/33400?page=1

http://www.peakprosperity.com/forum/getting-your-friends-and-family-pay-attention/26150

http://www.peakprosperity.com/forum/convincing-spouserelative/4851

http://www.peakprosperity.com/forum/spouse-who-just-dont-get-it/14777?page=1

I got these by typing friends" and "spouse" in to the search box, but I know there are more too.

 

 

 

Tycer's picture
Tycer
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Re: Preparing as a Woman for the Crash

I have to agree with Dr. Martenson 100%. I am male and feel similarly isolated. Hopefully the fairer gender will speak up to help you feel less isolated here and perhaps direct you to female leaders speaking. Ellen Brown is the only one I follow.

Regarding guns, If you have any interest, then yes. It's a great skill to have, even if you never own a gun. Learning how to handle guns definitely helps level the playing field. Here is my suggestion on how to begin. Find a range that offers lessons and buy yourself a couple of hours. Tell them you want to learn safety, types of guns, and how to operate and shoot several of the different types, beginning with a 22 pistol. If you are unsure how to find a range that will suit your needs, try the National Shooting Sports Foundation database, ask for advice on the PeakProsperity.com thread on firearms, or write Tom at guntalk.com and ask him. Also visit The Cornered CatGuntalk.tv, and The Survival Podcast.

Having a firearm for protection is but a minor part of a comprehensive plan for thriving in this fast changing world. You will find many threads on this forum dedicated to preparing mentally and physically. It's a great resource and a wonderful group of people.

Welcome to the forum. Pull up a chair and stay a while.

pinecarr's picture
pinecarr
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Re: Preparing as a Woman for the Crash
Chris wrote:

Here at the site there are lots of women involved, although with the anonymity it is not always easy to tell who is who doing the posting.

I would suggest that your sense of isolation has less to do with your friends being female and more to do with their particular views at this time. 

Welcome Stephanie!

I would agree with Chris's observation above. There are women on the site, although it is hard to know the ratio.  I suspect there may be more men than women, but I don't know for sure.

I wholeheartedly agree with Chris's comment on your sense of isolation more likely having to do with a general lack of acceptance of these ideas (by both men and women) vs it being a woman thing.  I'm a woman, and my husband has made it more than clear that I am not to mess with his rose-colored glasses, thank-you very much.  Likewise -those of my friends and family who I have tried to inform -both men and women- have pretty uniformly made it clear that they think my views are extreme (I'm not extreme, I'm just a pragmatist!).  The only exception was one cousin -a woman- who was totally open to the ideas, and was blown away by what she learned in the crash course.  But I think her acceptance of the ideas was more a function of who she is and her open-mindedness, not that she's a woman.

You asked about women who are leaders in these areas.  I can think of two women who are greatly respected on this site and other related sites: Ellen Brown, author of one of Chris's recommended reading books, "The Web of Debt".  She is a really important author in terms of opening people's eyes to the reality of our money system.  Her website is at webofdebt.com.  Another is Sharon Astyk, who has a great website and books on sustainable food storage and preservation.  Her website is at sharonastyk.com .

Hope to see you around the threads,

pinecarr

 

suesullivan's picture
suesullivan
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Re: Preparing as a Woman for the Crash

Stephanie, I highly recommend Sharon Astyk and Christine Patton as peak oil/prepper bloggers, if you're looking for  feminine voices. The forums here are incredibly useful as well.

I have just a handful of people, aside from my husband, in real life, who I can talk to about peak-oil/economic crisis issues (without the conversational ball dropping dead to the ground when I lob it) and all of them are women (a couple are fellow food gardening group volunteers, two are from a homeschooling group). I doubt I'd find anyone from my old life as an urban professional who would take me seriously on this topic. You might have to start looking for outside-the-mainstream people to connect with, if you want local support.

fwiw,

Sue

Amanda V's picture
Amanda V
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Re: Preparing as a Woman for the Crash

If you google transition towns and try to find a local group - that is a great way of connecting with like minded people locally. 

But that is very different to convincing the people you already have in your life that you have something worth listening to.

Wendy S. Delmater's picture
Wendy S. Delmater
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Re: Preparing as a Woman for the Crash

Hi, I'm another gal on the site.

Before I came here I was isolated like you. I my case I took the drastic step of looking for a mate at the age of 50. After three and a half years of looking I found a mate in a semit-rural area . I quit a six-figure job in NYC to move to SC and marry the guy. (He's debt-free, handy, sensible and great company!) Had I not found him I might be prepping in a very high-population area.

Then my brother suggested I take the Crash Course and here I am. If I had to prep back in NY as a simgle woman I'd be doing a lot of the same things I am doing here in the Carolinas: set food aside, set medicine aside, make sure I had alternative means of power, and be as self-sufficient as possible . 

I used to live on Long Island and garden in USDA zone 5. Now I am in zone 8/9 and we've just put in a huge square foot garden. Some of it is doing quite well; other things are failed experiments, but I am learning what to grow here.  Through this site I know of people in cities, however, that are woking on community gardens and hydropics and aquaculture.

I never handled a firearm in my life. Now I've taken a gun safety course, but if I'd stayed in NY state they are so anti-gun that self-defense courses would have been my first choice.

We installed an airtight woodburning stove for winters and a solar attic fan and repaired window screens for the summers. You can do whatever is possible to get off the grid: Doing things like using an LCD laptop screen or flat screeen monitor or TV instead of a CST monitor will lower your electric bill and that's aways helpful, right? But doing things like gettng a good home library of books and selection of things to do if the power goes out will  make you even more ready for natural disaters (as well as manmade ones.)

Our prep list is a mile long but at least our eyes are open and we are working on postive projects that will help us have a better future. When a relative who is not on board with what needs to be done criticizes us, we juts tell them that even if we are wrong about the crash we think is coming we will still have cheaper electric bills and cheaper, healthier food from our garden - plus all the joy & exercise gardening brings us. Welcome to the CM community. Ask if you have any questions. There are many intelligent and helpful people on these forums. None of us is as smart as all of us.

ashvinp's picture
ashvinp
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Re: Preparing as a Woman for the Crash
soulsurfersteph wrote:

The second part of my question/comment is that when I talk to female friends about this issue they don't seem to take it very seriously. Somehow our culture has brainwashed women into thinking economics is not an interesting subject. I would be interested to know if there are any FEMALE leaders out there writing or speaking about this issue.

My two  favorite econo/energy bloggers are CM and Stoneleigh at The Automatic Earth (theautomaticearth.blogspot.com), who happens to be female. I don't think she really makes any distinction between genders in her writings or tailors specific preparation advice for females, but she is great and you should definitely check the site out. Also here is a recent lecture she gave in the UK in audio format with pictures of the slides she presented - http://sheffield.indymedia.org.uk/2010/06/453356.html

soulsurfersteph's picture
soulsurfersteph
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Re: Preparing as a Woman for the Crash

Thank you for all the responses and information. I will check into the women writers recommended. 

I had started thinking about whether there were any women leaders in econoblogging when I read the article on oftwominds.com relating to a meeting with Chris and a few other guys who were called the "top econobloggers." There weren't any women mentioned at this meeting so I was just curious as to where the women were. I'll be checking out those links, thank you.

A few random thoughts/observations in no particular order:

One is that a lot of preparation recommendations I see (here and elsewhere) focus on people who already own houses. I'm in an apartment, and all of my friends here are as well (scattered across a very large city). We're mostly Generation X or late boomers, a lot of creative types not following traditional career paths, and even friends who are working dayjobs aren't home-owners (at 40!). My generation (for the most part) has simply not amassed the kind of wealth the boomers have. The houses around here at the height of the bubble shot up to almost a million. The boomers who bought them years ago got them for possibly a tenth of that price. We've been shut out.

I guess on the positive side we don't have as much to lose. I'm not worrying about protecting my assets as I have none. I am not going through any sort of shock or grief about all of this as I never achieved the "American Dream" to begin with. 

But along with that, I am not in a place where I can buy solar panels, install wood stoves in my home, or start my own garden. (I don't even have the types of windows that would allow me to put a box out the window - however, I lucked out and have a landlord that put in a food garden in the middle of the building that we can all harvest.)

I wish someone would come up with a portable solar panel that could be attached outside the window of any apartment. But I think if I do end up getting some sort of generator it will have to be one of those you attach to your bicycle.

What I have been able to do here is get rid of my car and walk, bike and use public transit.

I think in the worst-case scenario of "everything goes to hell" I could end up moving in with parents. But the parents on both sides (family is split) are not really savvy to this stuff - my mom already told me, she is NEVER going to garden. Because both of my sets of parents on the opposite side of the country I've been thinking it would be better to possibly move a little closer to them...so if the SHTF I won't have an entire country to cross by bicycle. :-)

I see a lot of transition/crash people planning on hunkering down in little home bunkers, but for someone such as myself who is still transitory it's not really an option at this moment. I think I'm leaning more towards the "stay lean and be prepared to move when necessary" strategy, at least for now.

Which is where I am thinking self-defense is probably one of few things I can do at this time. I've already done Krav Maga and other martial arts in the past...I'm just rusty. Unfortunately, martial arts classes are expensive...

My biggest question...what the heck to do career-wise? The economy hit my sole-proprietor business really hard and I have no clue what to do for the future. Post-crash career options?

Thanks again
Namaste

bluebird's picture
bluebird
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Re: Preparing as a Woman for the Crash

I too am female, and love the CM website. While I was able to get spouse to watch the Crash Course with me, he does not think there is anything to prepare for. If the crash comes, he will deal with it then, though he seriously doesn't believe it will happen in his lifetime. (we are in our early 60's). Unfortunately, I was not able to get any of my circle of family and friends to watch the Crash Course. They think that since I am not a professional financial planner, I don't know anything. But I have learned a lot from this site,  I also read http://theautomaticearth.blogspot.com/ for additional preparations, especially the primers. 

For another woman's perspective about preparations, check out this posting http://www.peakprosperity.com/forum/depression-and-marriage-problems-tak...

 

Wendy S. Delmater's picture
Wendy S. Delmater
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Re: Preparing as a Woman for the Crash

Namaste,

My son is in your age bracket and had similar problems in Florida - the economy is awful there. He's moving in with us in small-business-freindly South Carolina and already has money-making projects and work. Plus at home he's doing a lot of the grunt work that hubby and I cannot do (we are both 55 and I am the recipient of a new hip). But "we get it" about prepping and so does he. Many of our older relatives do not or cannot "get it." My mother and father in law refuse to think it could get all that bad. All my aunts (in their 80s) cannot seem to deal with the emotional aspects of a coming crash on top of aging.

My cousin Peggy in Charleston cannot get her mother (my aunt) on board about prepping, but she is still allowed to store things in her mother's rural home. In Charleston Peggy has three months of food set aside which puts her way ahead of her coworkers. At her mother's place so far she has she's stored ammo (Peggy's former Army with a sharpshooter's badge; glad she's on my side!) and other essentals. Her mothers place, her "bug out" place, is only four hours away, though.

One thing I hear over and over is to avoid large cities if you can and to get out of them if power, water and food supplies will be cut. When it all comes down may be too late. Note: If moving in with your folks means moving from an urban place you know to another urban place you don;t know, that might not be good. If your parent;s place is suburban, the lower population density the better, and moving would only be adviseable (IMHO) if you want to help your parents and they want to help you. Your relative youth may be an asset to your parents, if nothing else, and they could provide a roof over your head. Whatever you could do to help them stockpile extra medicine and food would be a blessing.

Or you could do something drastic and join a rural community. They exist: Sager on this site is a working part of one he intends to join. Transition towns are springing up: google them and see if one appeals to you. In the meantime you could learn a skill that might be useful. I have friends who go to Rennaisance Fairs that have learned how to spin wool and weave cloth or other things that are getting to be forgotten arts. And hey, some of that stuff is fun!

Let us know if there is any way we can help.

Safewrite

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mooselick7
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Re: Preparing as a Woman for the Crash

Soulsurfer - great handle. 

This apple has a stem but I thought that I would share a few things.  And frankly, these suggestions apply to every apple out there.

Another female blogger is Kathy McMahon at www.peakoilblues.com.  She has been a great help to me.  

I would recommend both martial arts AND firearms training.   We have several women in our martial arts club.  From 4 years old to 68 years old, I have seen two women get black belts in their 60s one in taekwondo and the other in judo.  They look both look like your average garden variety grandmas.  But, these grannies are not to be messed with.  I also assist teaching a women's self defense class. Martial arts is proactive on many levels.  Physically, it helps with every aspect of fitness: speed, agility, flexibility, cardio. Some groups will extend this to simple weapons such as the long staff, quarterstaff, knife, swords, night stick and short stick,  Mentally, it reduces stress.  Increases awareness.  Deconstructs the conditioning of being a demure victim.   Gives you confidence using your body.  It gives you an understanding of disble your attacker.   It forces you to relax and breathe in the most stressful of situations.   It teaches you to give and TAKE pain.   Spiritually, it allows us to explore our darker nature.  It doesnt make sense to most but the more I get into the arts of violence; the more at peace I feel.  Many women I have worked with are absolutely horrified by the mental and spiritual side of martial arts.  Know yourself.  

Find the right club tho.  If it doesnt feel right, then it isnt.

All of the above will optimize your use of firearms.  The thing with firearms is that you have to recognize the threat first then react in time.  You need awareness, grace under stress and a clear understanding of what you are about to do BEFORE you point a weapon at someone.  You will be a victim if you are attacked by surprise.

As far as finding friends to share your concerns with the future...  My wife has the same problem.  I have the same problem.  I would bet that everyone here has the same problem.  I have found that it is unsociable to share every CONCERN with everyone right away.  Just throw a few harmless tidbits at them and when the deer in the headlights look comes change the subject and go on.  I have a few friends that I go places I cant go.  Peak oil, silver manipulation, global elite: I get it but alien genetics, multi-dimensions, HAARP mind control: me no get.    This is the richness of friendship. 

There are pros and cons to living either urban, suburban or rural.  Dmytri Orlov (http://cluborlov.blogspot.com/) and Fernando Ferfal Aquirre (http://ferfal.blogspot.com/) talk about this.  In the event of collapse, it is going to be hard everywhere. You can prepare for this without a house or a group.  Just take Chris' self-assessment and start working on your weaknesses.  Read the Definative (blank) Threads on this site.  Read the recommended books.  Work on getting some basic gear together.  (http://www.survival-center.com/dl-list/dl30-pak.htm)  Orient your offtime toward building skills.  Get with the local garden clubs or find a community garden.  Network with at the Farmer's Market.

My suggestion is to find an environment where you can thrive.  I thrive in a cold, dry, remote small town in the mountains. (I woke up this morning with snow on my windshield. - what month is it anyway/)   I travel throughout the USA but, as soon as I get off the plane and take in that cool, clean mountain air, Im home.   However, a 3 month frost free growing season (with luck), poor soil, aging infrastructure, poor medical services and a 3 days worth supply of food delivered to the nearest big box grocery is not for those who dont know how to deal with it.   Where do you thrive?  Where do you feel comfortable?  Where do you know how to take care of yourself in the outdoors?   Sharon Asytk and Kathy McMahon both talk about this.

I dont know how old you are.  Some say we become set in our ways in our mid 30s.  I dont believe that but my suggestion is to find a mentor to guide you.  there are no concrete rules here; but my life has been enriched by several mentors in parts of my life.   Do you want to be a self reliant, resilient, independent woman?   Pay attention and you will find a mentor who embodies this.   Be warned:  Although being self-reliant, resilent and independent is the most rewarding work you can do but it can also be physically and mentally exhausting, boring and lonely. 

I applaud you for being here and reaching out.  You are already ahead of the crowd with awareness.  Do something everyday toward preparing - it will make you feel better.

 

 

 

Tycer's picture
Tycer
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Re: Preparing as a Woman for the Crash

I like the mobile aspect you have. It's an asset. Capitalize on that as far as preps go. Light and lean. Here's a great book for a tiny 72 hour survival kit you make your own. 98.6 Degrees: The Art of Keeping Your Ass Alive

Where to go, what to take. Water is most important, shelter and fire right behind. Start there. Start small and go from there. Have plans to go to A, B, or C via X, Y, or Z. 

If you have to go camp on mom's couch, how do you get there? Have three routes. You and yours should know all three well. Where do you stop along the way? Can you drop bags of preps along your routes? Do it. Do something. Taking the teeniest baby step forward by physically doing something every week towards preps really gets the juices going. The thing snowballs and you'll find yourself mentally rock hard even if you only have a small stash of life saving stuff.

What primitive/ 1800's skills can you enjoy, learn and carry with you that make you a non-expendable asset and put food in your mouth as you travel? 

A city in anarchy may be life for a while, but you can't watch over your shoulder 24/7 and the chances of taking a hit grow every day. Enjoy what you have now and maybe when it all goes South for a short time, but have your escape planned well and be prepared to bail out, Be prepared to have your well laid plans altered by external forces.

A very good book on the physiology and psychology of stress is Deep Survival: Who Lives, Who Dies and Why. Know thyself.

Amanda V's picture
Amanda V
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Posts: 262
Re: Preparing as a Woman for the Crash
mooselick7 wrote:

I would recommend both martial arts AND firearms training.   We have several women in our martial arts club.  From 4 years old to 68 years old, I have seen two women get black belts in their 60s one in taekwondo and the other in judo.  They look both look like your average garden variety grandmas.  But, these grannies are not to be messed with.  I also assist teaching a women's self defense class. Martial arts is proactive on many levels.  Physically, it helps with every aspect of fitness: speed, agility, flexibility, cardio. Some groups will extend this to simple weapons such as the long staff, quarterstaff, knife, swords, night stick and short stick,  Mentally, it reduces stress.  Increases awareness.  Deconstructs the conditioning of being a demure victim.   Gives you confidence using your body.  It gives you an understanding of disble your attacker.   It forces you to relax and breathe in the most stressful of situations.   It teaches you to give and TAKE pain.   Spiritually, it allows us to explore our darker nature.  It doesnt make sense to most but the more I get into the arts of violence; the more at peace I feel.  Many women I have worked with are absolutely horrified by the mental and spiritual side of martial arts.  Know yourself.  

Mooselick.  Thanks for this post.  I had never considered martial arts but after reading this I think I would like to find out more and try it.  Thanks for the eye opener.

 

Full Moon's picture
Full Moon
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Posts: 1258
Re: Preparing as a Woman for the Crash

 Hey  Girl , One of my sugestions is to make sure you are up on your dental work .     Not looking forward to primative dental proceedures .   Hey maybe that is what you need to study up on  because our personal dentist is high tech !  If we are even going back 100 years .... scary !

soulsurfersteph's picture
soulsurfersteph
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Posts: 204
Re: Preparing as a Woman for the Crash

Thanks for all the additional comments.

Not to get totally off-topic, but I just wanted to comment that I am not of the mind that all cities will become instant hell-holes. For an excellent piece on why cities may continue to be viable, please see:

http://www.oftwominds.com/blogjun10/future-of-cities06-10.html

The thing is, where I live now, I don't need a car to get around, because I am in a city. Cities are definitely more "walkable" or at least bikeable than scattered, distant suburbs. CIties have busses and maybe trains, and I presume will continue to have some form of public transportation in the future.

There are plenty of cities around the world that do not have the same energy usage as American cities and people do manage to exist and live in them. 

For me, the question more becomes where are the *good* cities of the future.

I'm in Los Angeles right now. Considering that we can't even handle a basketball game without a riot, I don't think this is going to be a safe city if we have massive economic turmoil, which is why I am planning on leaving. I think some areas of LA may be OK but you'll have to be rich to live there. But I have no intention at this time to move to a rural area. I lived in Seattle for a year and that size city is one that I think might be livable in the future. Or at least an Ann Arbor-sized city. (Go blue!)

If it's a question of peak oil (I'm not talking about the issue of civil unrest), being somewhere where I don't have to drive an hour just to get to civilization is certainly more appealing to me personally.

I also feel that people should be working to make cities more sustainable and not just abandon them completely. 

There are official Transition teams in my area...though I went to one meeting and everyone was much older than me and already homeowners. Not much is being done in regards to more transient populations and younger people, it seems.

Not knowing what is going to happen makes it a little hard to plan...I realize a lot of people here are planning for the worst but some of us simply don't have the money/resources/living space to stockpile large amounts of supplies (where am I am going to put 10 years' worth of toilet paper in a one-bedroom apartment that can barely fit my current needs)?

I'm still trying to get a sense of future career paths that don't involve grinding corn or churning butter. I'd like to think we won't completely throw out modern civilization in a span of 5 years. :-)

As to whether I move in with parents or not...that is a last-ditch option and hopefully will not be necessary (and hopefully my parents will be healthy and thriving on their own for years to come). Also depends on what happens with my long distance relationship, which is still extremely new. It's not quite time yet to be picking out curtains together, even though the world may be ending tomorrow. At least *he* is aware of all this stuff, as he is following this very thread. :-)

Guess I'm just playing it by ear and trying to be emotionally/physically/spiritually prepared. Materially, I will have to trust that God (or whatever you call the higher power) is going to provide. I've lived a freelance life of hand to mouth most of my adult years, and so far I have been provided for, and often in the most magical, surprising ways. Somehow I think that will continue, as long as I remain flexible, adaptable and resilient.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Xanthis's picture
Xanthis
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Joined: Dec 1 2009
Posts: 7
Re: Preparing as a Woman for the Crash
soulsurfersteph wrote:

Thank you for all the responses and information. I will check into the women writers recommended.

Not to be unhelpful, but this seems reminiscent of the type of sexism that I thought we had left in the past.  I am myself fresh out of college, and I've heard very few girls (or boys) my age speak in that way, which is a healthy trend.

When speaking to the older generation it is not uncommon.  You remind me of old men from the WWII (and even the Boomer) generation who only want to take advice from another man, or read a "how-to" book written by a man, or listen to a lecture given by a man.  [insert grunting noises].  What?

I can't imagine how making personal and financial preparations could differ depending on what sex you are.  The idea that just because I sit down to pee I can only learn how to make investment decisions and purify water from another female is just silly.

You remind me of the old man who walks into a car repair shop, notices that all women are working there, and wonders where the men are so that he can have his car repaired by one of them.

Soulsurfer, I invite you to take an enourmous lesson from the younger generation (even if you're a member of it), and leave that type of unhelpful thinking in the history books where it belongs.

Wendy S. Delmater's picture
Wendy S. Delmater
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Posts: 1982
Re: Preparing as a Woman for the Crash

Xanthis: Sexism regarding prep talk for and from women? Let me preface my remarks by telling you I'm a heavy construction safety manager, who is used to managing up to 400 men, and up to 70 subcontractors at a time, in an incredibly male-dominated field. My work requires that I communicate with men and that I understand the differences between how men and women communicate. There are differences.

Men are more competitive than women, and that seems hardwired in. By this I am not saying that women cannot be competive: all human traits are distributed in both sexes, but I am saying it skews toward competition for men. Men also tend to be problem solvers, and by that I'm not saying that women do not solve prolems. When you bring up a problem men assume, as a rule, that you want help solving it. Women are motivated by relationships: if they bring up a problem they may just want to vent and not feel alone with it.There can be misunderstandings based on these values.

The differences in communication styles are why women might sometimes enjoy a female perspective and men might prefer a male one. So I can see why a woman prepper might want to talk to another woman prepper, or follow her blog or whatever.

Besides, that way you don't have to listen to us talk about stockpiling tampons. Let her follow a female prep blog if she wants. A more helpful response would be to suggest male prepper bloggers she might also enjoy.

soulsurfersteph's picture
soulsurfersteph
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Re: Preparing as a Woman for the Crash
Xanthis wrote:

Soulsurfer, I invite you to take an enourmous lesson from the younger generation (even if you're a member of it), and leave that type of unhelpful thinking in the history books where it belongs.

I already follow plenty of men in this arena...I did not know of any women, so from my perspective the entire field seemed to be pretty male dominated. I wasn't suggesting I did not want to listen to men, but that I'd like to see what women leaders were out there. So you have it backwards.

Furthermore, just because the people you personally know from college aren't tuned into women's issues doesn't mean they don't exist. From my now "crotchety old lady" status at the tender age of "just turned 40," your generation seems to be woefully blind to the exploitation of women that it itself often engages in. Witness the number of young female college students who are all too willing to strip naked for the sake of animal rights for PETA, not realizing that by contributing to the oversexualization of women's bodies, they are making it harder for women to be taken seriously in other arenas...look at the derisive, sexist comments thrown at women politicians such as Sarah Palin ("Caribou Barbie") or at Nancy Pelosi ("Botox Pelosi"). "Girls Gone Wild" is not progress; it is regression. Pole dancing may be good exercise, but it's still tacky and exploitative.

Girls these days often have very poor role models to look up to..."Hannah Montana" has now "grown up" and is fast becoming another pop disaster, walking around without underwear and flashing her wares for everyone to see at 17.

We do need more women leaders. Women are less than 20% of the US Senate, and 74 out of 435 representatives in the House. Until those numbers get more in line with the general population, women have a long way to go...whether your young friends realize it or not.

So am I interested to see what women are leading in regards to econoblogging and the transition? Absolutely. Does that make me some sort of horrible man-hating ballbuster? Absolutely not.

Beyond that, women have specific issues that men do not have in regards to their survival in a possible economic cataclysm. For one thing, we are generally smaller and weaker than males physically, and are in much greater danger of being raped or otherwise physically harmed should a situation arise where criminal gangs took over with the breakdown of societal structure.

I'm a single female and I never rent an apartment on the ground floor. Why? Because I would not feel safe and would worry about someone climbing in through my window and raping me. Do you have that fear? See, if you don't, because you are a guy, then you really can't totally speak to women on all the issues that might possibly come up for us when it comes to survival.

Here's another issue a man might not think about. Birth control and its availability. What will happen if society structure breaks down to the point where the distribution of birth control pills stops? Did you know that in some areas, women who want to use non-hormonal options such as the diaphragm are having a hard time finding them already because they aren't manufactured as much? 

And...should I have children if things are going to get really bad? If I get pregnant and there's no hospital, would I know someone who is a midwife? How to take care of a young child in a collapse environment? What if you are a single mom and don't have a man around to protect the family?

Being interested in these things does not make me anti-male...they are just things that might not be addressed if ONLY men were writing and speaking about the crash.

mooselick7's picture
mooselick7
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Re: Preparing as a Woman for the Crash

Soulsurfer:  I just listened to an audiobook that you may find an inspiration.  Farm City by Novella Carpenter  http://www.amazon.com/Farm-City-Education-Urban-Farmer/dp/0143117289/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1276918808&sr=8-1  She is not a prepper but she has the right idea. She is in urban Oakland, Ca.

See the author on video here.  

Xanthis: Clue up, Man.

land2341's picture
land2341
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Re: Preparing as a Woman for the Crash

Well see here sonny,  call me old all you want and I will still agree with Soul searcher that it is good to talk with women who get what we are talking about.  I am very fortunate that both of my sisters are to varying degrees, prepping.  So we have teamed up to provide different things we have and can.  Sister in the city (new show?)  is working on meds and things like pads and tampons and other specifics like - cranberry juice anyone? - I am working on food and farming the other sister is working on protection prep.  

One of my biggest issues personally is that I am medication dependent.  If my meds run completely out I will possibly make it a couple of months - maybe then I am dead.  So since the powers that be make it extremely hard to stockpile the type of meds I take my foremost concern all of the time is making sure my kids will be cared for.  So, I need women,  I need my sisters.  

I think the teaming up idea with other women would probably work well for you so that you can work on balancing what you can do with what some one else can do.  My house is everyone's BOL,  but they have assigned things they must bring.  

So, count me sexist as you like,  but I enjoy the company of women and the perspective they bring to prepping issues like feminine hygiene, diapers, UTIs and child care.  And for some of us the overwhelming fear of what will happen to our children......

Full Moon's picture
Full Moon
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Re: Preparing as a Woman for the Crash

Land !    How wonderful you have your sisters!  Is is possible for you to get your stock pile of meds from Mexico or Canada ? can you learn  of and grow the herb that might be what  would work for you ?

 I often long for a sister to share things with ( God gave me ALL brothers )   So must find my kindred spirits from gal friends . 

http://www.labyrinth.net.au/~obsidian/clothpads/index.htm

http://www.diapersewing.com/

http://www.diaperjungle.com/sewing-cloth-diapers.html

http://www.keeper.com/

   FM

 

 

soulsurfersteph's picture
soulsurfersteph
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Posts: 204
Re: Preparing as a Woman for the Crash

I love how when things like cloth menstrual pads come up, the men skedaddle from the thread! ;-)

I do appreciate all these links...it's going to take me a week to get through them all.

On the issue of medications...I obviously don't know anyone's particular situation here, so pardon me if this does not apply, but I really encourage everyone to get in shape and lose weight as soon as possible. A lot of people can get off their medications just through exercise and weight loss. I am also into holistic healing and alternative medicine, and I've had my own chronic illness that I've mostly cured thanks to alternative means. Just something to look into...don't rely on Western medicine to cure you...they just put a band-aid on but make us reliant on constant drug intake rather than actually curing the problem.

 

 

Full Moon's picture
Full Moon
Status: Diamond Member (Offline)
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Posts: 1258
Re: Preparing as a Woman for the Crash

    Just getting real .    Sometimes life is messy .       As for the health issues.... thank you for the reminder .... especially for us fat ,lazy ones.

Romans12.2's picture
Romans12.2
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Posts: 227
Re: Preparing as a Woman for the Crash

I bought the cloth menstral pads sold on ebay for my 13 year old daughter and also a silicone collection cup (for myself) that is SO cool.  I use it already and it never leaks and I never use anything else.

We also have medicine issues.  My husband had a heart attack last year at 42 and HAS to take plavix for the rest of his life to keep his hearts stents clear of blockage.  We were able to buy a six month sorta illegal supply of a generic from Canada.   It cost us a pretty penny.  I like to think that if TSHTF one of my first stops would be into the pharmacy where I convince someone to sell me every plavix they have.  Life post collapse is scary enough, without my husband it sounds impossible.

I would reccomend any woman alone in this world to pray for and earnestly seek a husband!  Tons of great hard working, smart guys are Smileon this site. 

Is there a singles thread yet?

SagerXX's picture
SagerXX
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Posts: 2219
Re: Preparing as a Woman for the Crash
safewrite wrote:

Men are more competitive than women, and that seems hardwired in. By this I am not saying that women cannot be competive: all human traits are distributed in both sexes, but I am saying it skews toward competition for men. Men also tend to be problem solvers, and by that I'm not saying that women do not solve prolems. When you bring up a problem men assume, as a rule, that you want help solving it. Women are motivated by relationships: if they bring up a problem they may just want to vent and not feel alone with it.There can be misunderstandings based on these values.

It took me about 2-3 years of marriage to understand this *and* be able to recognize those moments as they happened and to do things differently.  Made my life a lot easier.  Also reinforced the idea that yes, I may be 45 but I can still learn new tricks.  

As for talk of menses & related paraphernalia -- I haven't been stampeded off the thread.  <smile>  Never quite understood why that subject squicked so many otherwise reasonable/tough guys.  

This is an excellent thread.  Thanks steph.

Viva -- Sager

land2341's picture
land2341
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Posts: 402
Re: Preparing as a Woman for the Crash

Honestly, on the days when I am being realistic I am fully aware of the fact that in a time line a hundred years before ours I would not have lived long enough to reproduce.  In a way,  I should have been an evolutionary dead end.  And Dh and I had many a long frank discussion before breeding for this very purpose.  I know other people who have chosen not to have children both because they thought there were too many people here anyway,  and because they thought they carried too many bad genetic traits that would weaken the gene pool or bring into the world people whose lives would be a drain on everyone else.  I personally think that what Darwin himself said was "survival of the fit"  and that fit is a transient state depending on any eternal variables that can change and create a different version of fit.  

This applies perfectly to our current situation.  Some women (yes, I am being sexist and generalizing get over it)  choose men based on ideas of how well they will provide.  But, social parameters for "providing" have changed greatly over the years!  Women I know were aghast at my choice as they did not see my spouse as being what this society views as "successful".  But, it is funny how often they call on him for help.  (Their husbands frequently do!)  He may not be what is viewed as successful for this society - but I do not view this society as being successful!  So, I was choosing for the one I think will come after!  

He,  on the other hand did not do so well in choosing me.  I am successful now,  but am not likely to be in what comes next.  My sister is working with me on herbal or shamanistic cures for what ails us both to varying degrees.  We have been somewhat successful in this.  She does the research and I research growing and distilling.  I think we will be successful.  I now take much less medication than I once did.  Fitness was never an issue for either of us and we are both thin and physically fit.  It is simply genetics.  But, to me that means I need to make the most of my time and contribute as much as I can.  My children has a 33% chance of having the same illness,  but so far it appears that neither of them have it,  but we have not had them tested choosing to let them decide for themselves when they are older if they want to know.

Everyone knows that they will die.  The one absolute of life is that no one gets out alive.  The question is how do you want to live the time you have?  

 

So, can you tell me more about the silicone pads???  My cycles are horrendous!!!

Full Moon's picture
Full Moon
Status: Diamond Member (Offline)
Joined: Oct 14 2008
Posts: 1258
Re: Preparing as a Woman for the Crash

   land2341                          http://www.divacup.com/  

 Total Fem Bal   homeopathic ,tri-potent ,sublingual ,spray .    from Mirco west .  It is a mix  of Adrenals , DHEA , etc.   $19.20   May have to find a distributor . Our Wellness Dr. orders for us .               There are  also some hormone creams you can rub on your thigh.

    If you wanted to PM me I could send you some.

  Funny you speak of survival of the fittest .   I was joking with some of my daughters because in 4-H we only breed the top of the line of each species. So when looking  for there own mate  I would  say that  such and such guy does not have good conformation and a family history of cancer !      But sure seams like the mutts are the strongest  .  Our mutt horses can run the fastest  our mutt dogs obey the best    So  they married their men for their heart  anyway .    Now the younger ones I tease that I am headed right over to the Amish !

 Dear Lady  , You are right to live each day  for itself   no one is promised tomorrow .

land2341's picture
land2341
Status: Gold Member (Offline)
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Posts: 402
Re: Preparing as a Woman for the Crash

One quick note - Darwin never said survival of the fittest.  He said survival of the fit.  There is a HUGE difference between the two!  Besides Darwin did not say it at all originally - it was coined by Herbert Spencer who was a theorist who believed that poor people were poor because they were lesser than those who were wealthy and they should be allowed to starve and die.  Darwin did not use the term until his 5th edition and then only reluctantly because he did NOT think the fittest survived or that even the fit survived.  He thought it was those who could adapt the quickest.  But, swift adaptation to existing circumstances did not always lead to a more fit creature!

Some genetic traits - like schizophrenia are positively linked to high intelligence and other individuals who "should" not have been allowed to survive have been those who contributed the most to the overall well being of humanity........  It was that that made me and my DH decide to breed.  Replacement rate (2 kids only),  but an awareness that genetics are not everything.

 

Thanks for the link!!!

Full Moon's picture
Full Moon
Status: Diamond Member (Offline)
Joined: Oct 14 2008
Posts: 1258
Re: Preparing as a Woman for the Crash

 Another link for those who do not wish to sew .      http://www.naturallycozy.com/   

 Ps . thanks for the  history lesson .

 FM

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