Please advise

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radiance's picture
radiance
Status: Silver Member (Offline)
Joined: Oct 11 2008
Posts: 112
Please advise

Please critique the following before I commit this to the back of a business card to be placed with the CC DVD.

Thank you 

Ron Fink

Michiana Chapter of the Crash Course (MCCC) is a volunteer effort to inform our community regarding profound lifestyle changes coming to Michiana. Chris Martenson the author of the Crash Course presents understandable, yet thorough insight into the unfolding economic events sweeping the entire world. Unemployment, underemployment and financial demise is striking families everywhere. Prudence demands families and communities prepare now for the modern world’s perfect storm. 

Martenson presents substantial evidence that the financial/economic storm which as of December 18, 2008 is considered a category-one will intensify to a category-five. MCCC goal is first; through education, encourage dialog among multiple communities and trigger locally directed action plans to help offset impending financial and social strain. We believe education and community action is critically needed now to mitigate suffering and consequential acute social unrest.

We are just starting our local effort and desire your guidance. Please help by first taking the Crash Course, then visit our web site, learn more and get involved.

radiance's picture
radiance
Status: Silver Member (Offline)
Joined: Oct 11 2008
Posts: 112
Re: Please advise

oops cut and paste did not work and I do not have a edit button

Sorry folks!

admin's picture
admin
Status: Administrator (Offline)
Joined: May 6 2007
Posts: 346
Re: Please advise

radiance,

Please use the "Paste as Plain Text" and "Paste from Word" buttons when pasting from other sites and documents.  The "Paste from Word" seems to work for some people and not for others, so your best bet is to always use the "Paste as Plain Text" option, then style the text as you wish.

Ron

Brandon's picture
Brandon
Status: Martenson Brigade Member (Offline)
Joined: Oct 6 2008
Posts: 143
Re: Please advise

Hi Ron.  I took a stab at some suggestions for your text.  I didn't know you were in the Michiana area. That's not too far from where I am...maybe we can help each other out in the future.

Anyway, got to go.  I added and removed a comma or two and restructured a sentence or two to my own personal liking, so do with it what you will.  Nice work.

 

The Michiana Chapter of the Crash Course (MCCC) is a
volunteer effort to inform our community regarding profound lifestyle
changes coming to Michiana. Chris Martenson, the author of the Crash
Course, presents understandable yet thorough insight into the unfolding
economic events sweeping the entire world. Unemployment,
underemployment and financial demise is striking families everywhere.
Prudence demands families and communities prepare now for the modern
world’s perfect storm.

Martenson presents substantial evidence that the
financial/economic storm, which as of December 18, 2008 is considered a
category-one, will intensify to a category-five. The goals of the MCCC are to encourage dialog among multiple communities
through education and
to trigger locally directed action plans to help offset impending
financial and social strain. We believe education and community action is critically needed now in order to mitigate suffering and consequential acute social unrest.

We are just starting our local effort and desire
your input. Please help by first taking the Crash Course, then by visiting
our web site to learn more and to get involved.

 

radiance's picture
radiance
Status: Silver Member (Offline)
Joined: Oct 11 2008
Posts: 112
Re: Please advise

Wow I like the fix up! I am clueless at writing. I took three intro to writing before passing.

Thank you 

Ron

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