Mathematicians Discover Largest Number (humor)

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cat233's picture
cat233
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Mathematicians Discover Largest Number (humor)

A friend emailed me this... I just couldn't resit not sharing!

Cat

 

MATHEMATICIANS DISCOVER LARGEST
NUMBER               

 

                                PALO
ALTO, CA - An international mathematics research team announced today that they
had discovered a new integer that surpasses any previously known value "by a
totally mindblowing shitload." Project director Yujin Xiao of Stanford
University said the theoretical number, dubbed a "stimulus," could lead to
breakthroughs in fields as diverse as astrophysics, quantum mechanics, and
Chicago asphalt contracting.

                               

                               
"Unlike previous large numbers like the Googleplex or the Bazillionty, the
Stimulus has no static numerical definition," said Xiao. "It keeps growing and
growing, compounding factorially, eating up all zeros in its path. It moves
freely across Cartesian dimensions and has the power to make any other number
irrational."

                               

                               
Jean-Luc Brossard, a researcher with the European consortium CERN, said the
number is so staggeringly large that it is difficult for even mathematicians to
grasp, let alone lay people.

                               

                                "The
number itself is incomprehensible by human minds, and can only be theoretically
understood in a fractional parallel universe which we refer to as the DC
dimension," said Brossard. "The best way to understand a stimulus is to imagine
a dollar sign followed by a packed string of hexidecimal nanodigits, wound into
a triple helix, woven into a dodecahedron, and stacked on top of one another.
Now imagine you were a black hole on the far edge of the universe, trying to
escape the stimulus at 30 times the speed of light. The stimulus would still
catch up to you and ram your black hole with such furious, repeated force that
it would cause your entire reality itself to collapse."

                               

                                Xiao
said the team discovered the number with the help of an international network of
24 nitrogen-cooled Cray Ultracluster supercomputers, the CERN particle
accelerator, and "three pounds of Humboldt County
Chronic."

                               

                                "The
exciting news is that with more powerful computers and drugs, we believe we are
on the verge of discovering an even larger number, which we refer to as a
'stimulusconferencebill,'" said Xiao. "Speaker Pelosi has already promised us
the funding."

Amanda V's picture
Amanda V
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Re: Mathematicians Discover Largest Number (humor)

The fact that they have not disclosed what this number is means it is a cover up from the public.  They can expect civil unrest if this number is not disclosed to the public.  I bet if you look closely there is a CIA connection here, follow the money and you will find it.

 

Rosemary Sims's picture
Rosemary Sims
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Re: Mathematicians Discover Largest Number (humor)

Oh my, cat!  Thank you for a wonderful hoorara guffaw on a dank day!

Rosemary

SagerXX's picture
SagerXX
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Re: Mathematicians Discover Largest Number (humor)

I bet the number was developed as part of a Pentagon off-budget program.  

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Cloudfire
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Re: Mathematicians Discover Largest Number (humor)

.a while. . .

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Dogs_In_A_Pile
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Re: Mathematicians Discover Largest Number (humor)
SagerXX wrote:

I bet the number was developed as part of a Pentagon off-budget program.  

As all good developments are..........................Cool

stpaulmercantile's picture
stpaulmercantile
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Re: Mathematicians Discover Largest Number (humor)

 

I think it's George Bush's fault.

RussB's picture
RussB
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Re: Mathematicians Discover Largest Number (humor)

That's funny as heck.

What's not funny is that it pretty accurately represents the mindset of the administration and the vested structure in general. There is no longer any "number" which could be meaningful to them; there's only infinity. They've given up completely on any kind of solution.

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pleaseremoveme
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Re: Mathematicians Discover Largest Number (humor)

Unfortunately, the number cannot easily be rendered in conventional notation. We mathematicians have had to develop a whole new language just to express numbers of this magnitude!

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Dr Rob
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Re: Mathematicians Discover Largest Number (humor)

Some times we need a visual representation to understand the enormity of some of the numbers we see bandied about.

What is a $trillion;This is a good visual  http://www.pagetutor.com/trillion/index.html

And just 2 of these at least have been given to Banks with no disclosure as to who got the money.

To save them from their own incompetence.

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