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What I am doing to prep…

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  • Fri, Mar 04, 2011 - 02:22pm

    #31
    ciscokid

    ciscokid

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    Joined: Mar 03 2011

    Posts: 8

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    Convincing a spouse

Folks,

I am as deeply concerned about the future and have been awakened so to speak.  I am doing my best to bring my wife into the plan but she is resistant.  I think because she is scared and does not want to see life change.  It could also be that she does not believe these things will come to pass. 

Does anyone have any advice?   I need her to be with me through this journey of preparation.  We have two young children and I want to make sure they have the best chance to succeed.  I know she does as well but seems to think everything will be okay as it is today.  I’d love to hear from anyone else that has had a similar challenge.

Thank you and best of luck.

  • Fri, Mar 04, 2011 - 02:39pm

    #32

    SagerXX

    Status Gold Member (Offline)

    Joined: Feb 11 2009

    Posts: 397

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    re: convincing a spouse

[quote=ciscokid]

Folks,

I am as deeply concerned about the future and have been awakened so to speak.  I am doing my best to bring my wife into the plan but she is resistant.  I think because she is scared and does not want to see life change.  It could also be that she does not believe these things will come to pass. 

Does anyone have any advice?   I need her to be with me through this journey of preparation.  We have two young children and I want to make sure they have the best chance to succeed.  I know she does as well but seems to think everything will be okay as it is today.  I’d love to hear from anyone else that has had a similar challenge.

Thank you and best of luck.

[/quote]

Hey cisco — welcome!

You are *so* not alone in this situation.  Check out these threads (incl. one by Dr. Chris’ wife Becca!) for plenty of thoughtful advice.  Good luck!

Viva — Sager

https://www.peakprosperity.com/forum/depression-and-marriage-problems-taking-red-pill/33400

https://www.peakprosperity.com/blog/dealing-reluctant-partner/49618

 

  • Fri, Mar 04, 2011 - 05:45pm

    #33

    Vanityfox451

    Status Gold Member (Offline)

    Joined: Dec 28 2008

    Posts: 373

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    Private Messaging Tips …

[quote=Romans12.2]

And if any of you know any PYSD (what is that, but it’s most likely me?) in SE Michigan, send me their name please.

I was just looking for a past member from MI and found their user privleges suspended, then see VF temporarily suspended and LR gone!  Whats up?  Where else can I find people talking about these things in case I get kicked off?

Thank you Jager for your list…I gave it to my one foot in and one foot out husband.  He brought home a vintage 11 pc Hamm radio he found on craigslist yesterday and has been reading about powering a pick-up with wood gas for three days!

I asked him at lunch “Honey why do you buy all the preps if you really think our world can just go on forever the way it is?”  He said, “Because I know it makes you feel better.”  True love.

[/quote]

Romans,

If you want to talk with me via private message, click on your name (Romans12.2), and below your name on that new page you’ll find a line of links in grey boxes with the words “View”, “Edit”, “My Content Subscriptions”, “Orders”, “Track” and “Personal Files”. Now click on the grey box marked “Edit”.

On this new page, scroll down to “Private Message Settings” and click on the box marked “Allow Private Messages”, and by miracle you’ll be able to send and recieve private messages from and to everyone on the site, even if they’re under temporary ban …Laughing

Yours is switched off at the moment, so I can’t contact you privately …

Jager,

This is a very timely thread …

~ VF ~

  • Fri, Mar 04, 2011 - 10:38pm

    #34
    Saffron

    Saffron

    Status Silver Member (Offline)

    Joined: Aug 29 2009

    Posts: 108

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    Convincing a spouse

[quote=ciscokid]

Folks,

I am as deeply concerned about the future and have been awakened so to speak.  I am doing my best to bring my wife into the plan but she is resistant.  I think because she is scared and does not want to see life change.  It could also be that she does not believe these things will come to pass. 

Does anyone have any advice?   I need her to be with me through this journey of preparation.  We have two young children and I want to make sure they have the best chance to succeed.  I know she does as well but seems to think everything will be okay as it is today.  I’d love to hear from anyone else that has had a similar challenge.

Thank you and best of luck.

[/quote]

cickokid, would your wife be more open to making preps for a natural disaster? Around here it’s earthquakes, but whatever part of the country you live in there’s bound to be something for which it would be wise to set aside food, water and some basic first aid items. Once you’ve started, it’s almost addictive to keep adding things to your pile just because they were on special.

A garden could be presented as a hobby for the whole family …. especially with young kids … let them have a section that is just theirs or do things like planting a sunflower house or bean teepee. Depending on how young they are, I just read (or rather, was read to 😉 a fun little book that could even be the basis for a sudden inspiration to garden: “Growing Vegetable Soup” by Lois Ehlert. Another book that I’ve heard is great (but haven’t read) is Roots, Shoots, Buckets and Boots by Sharon Lovejoy. Let the books be the inspiration for gardening rather than a fear of no food in the future.  

If she is open to making plans for a more expensive future, without looking at it as “collapse,” perhaps she wouldn’t mind taking advantage of current prices and buying things the kids would grow into: socks, undies, shoes, t’s, jeans …  again, just present it as, prices are going up, why not take advantage of this special and buy one in a larger size too.

PMs are a little harder, but we give silver coins to the kids on their birthdays and for Christmas … just a little way to add some in. You could always resort to giving her fine jewelry if need be … coins may be cheaper but a silver bracelet may be more palatable 😉

I realize it is much nicer if you can just have her on board so that she can be contributing ideas as well, but I am going on the premise that a) you start each journey with one small step and b) just heading in the direction you want to go will open up opportunities and conversations. Starting this way may make it seem less “nutty” … which is what seems to turn off most people. And with any luck, once you start, people who are also privately prepping will come out of the woodwork and start chatting and then it won’t seem like it’s just the two of you.

~ s 

  • Sat, Mar 05, 2011 - 01:06am

    #35

    Jager06

    Status Bronze Member (Offline)

    Joined: Dec 03 2009

    Posts: 94

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    Ciscokid…

Not much more to add to the advice given, but I thought I might share my own experience with my less than enthusiastic wife.

When I initially started doing some prep stuff, I did’nt really tell her why I was doing it. I was’nt completely convinced myself of the need, but I still had that little itch that I could’nt quite scratch.

I started by suggesting we harvest the blackberries and make jams and jellies and maybe even some wine, since it grows naturally along the creek here on the property. She thought that would be a fun thing to do with the kids, and so we made an appointment for her mom to come over and show all of us how to make jelly and do some simple fruit canning.

While we were doing that I asked a few pointed questions to her mother about what she remembers her parents telling her about the great depression. Her answers where just what I wanted to hear. SHe talked about their root cellar and bread lines. I talked about my grandparents storage that I remembered as a kid, and how my mother was required to report to their house for canning week every year. I told them how much my mom hated it and how my grandmother always lectured us about how things were during the Depression and how the food that was being canned would be enough for all of us for up to a year if necessary.

That conversation got carried on by me later when I picked up the subject with my wife. I told her I was looking into what had happened to cause the Depression and noticed some stark similarities to financial excesses that were taking place now. I used a couple of examples and left her to stew for a few days.

The next week I told her I thought we should really consider doing what our grandparents did, since we wlive in a wildland fire area and an earthquake zone. She told me she remembered the Loma Prieta quake and how they were totally cut off and reliant on the Red Cross and National Guard for emergency food and water. I suggested we start stockpiling food we like to eat when we are camping since we would use it that way anyway, and she agreed. We shopped online for Mountain House foods and I got some tips from other preppers on things that were good to have on hand.

From there I began to realize that all was not well in the financial markets, and got hooked on this site. I overran her in the prep category, and started catching some flack.

Then I started building the raised bed gardens. The kids lovedit and she got to be ok with it, until the harvest came in and then things were great. So I built a chicken coop. And started speaking about what I saw to groups who I was being asked to spek to about my experiences in Iraq. I just added a little more in at the end. Those groups turned into several teams of folks who are now all working together to build our individual and community sustainability/ preperations.

One of those groups spawned a business that just got permission from our County to build a 20MW solar plant on the old landfill.

My wife just called me ten minutes ago and aksed if she could take advantage of the sale at a local clothing store and buyt clothing for the kids for the next two years. She also made the last precious metals order herself, and has been demanding that I buy more tilapia from the store, since she likes it so much. I think that is a hint at her support for the aquaponics greenhouse I have told her we should be building next.

She still has reservations about things. But we now have two pallets of mormon food storage products, a pallet of mountain house, a garage with one wall full of canning supplies, and another wall full of personal hygiene products, canned fruits and vegetables, water filters, spices and seasonings.

Just a few questions got it going. Not making statements or grand pronouncements.

Best Wishes,

Jager06

  • Sat, Mar 05, 2011 - 02:29am

    #36

    Full Moon

    Status Gold Member (Offline)

    Joined: Oct 14 2008

    Posts: 265

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     I got the Hubby  full on

 I got the Hubby  full on board  to prep after one big  a$$$ fight . WHERE DOES ALL MY PAYCHECK GO ??? I said ” I have been partying when you were not looking !”    

   Always when some emergency came up he would say ” can’t you just take it out of the food budget ?”     Finally I said “NO !  In the 70’s you made $7 an hour , bread was 4 loaves to the dollar and we paid 40 cents for gas .  DO THE MATH !!! ”    He got mad …did the math  and  the light bulb came on . 

    You will know what it takes for your situation .

FM

  • Sat, Mar 05, 2011 - 02:48am

    #37

    Full Moon

    Status Gold Member (Offline)

    Joined: Oct 14 2008

    Posts: 265

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     But  back to the preps 

 But  back to the preps

  Do a little bit everyday .  Today  I got the grocery sale bills .  When to each store and bought a case or two of everything that was a supper deal .  I felt bad  not buying much of regular priced items and told the store manager so .  When he carried my groceries to the truck  I said” look at the price of gas . ”     He said “and going UP”    Then he did the neatest thing and said ” You know it may be cheaper if you want to buy the deli veggies . ”  I bought  a case butter  and cheese   and have  started to can it .  Warmed  up the house a filled some shelves .

    Ordered up a tank of propane  a large  order of  seeds  and started some peppers.     What more can we do ??

  • Sat, Mar 05, 2011 - 04:26am

    #38
    osb272646

    osb272646

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    Joined: Mar 14 2010

    Posts: 42

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    escape route reconnaisance

Jager, your comments to Steve R about reconnaisance of the route to one’s bug out place is spot on.

In 2009 my wife and I took our Jeep and camper trailer for an extended trip into Mexico.  Traffic patterns and road conditions down there can get one into trouble pretty quickly.  So we developed the practice of making a dry run in our Jeep whenever we wanted to move from one place to another.  Often these reconnaisance runs were part of our normal tourist activities.  But they allowed us to avoid all kinds of problems when it came time to hook up our trailer and move on down the road.

If relocating to a bug out place was part of my prepping strategy, I would physically go over every inch of my planned route at least four times per year.  Try to imagine what the route would look like in a SHTF event.  Look for trouble spots, alternate routes, etc.  Are there any places where one could flush necessities for future access?  Do this often enough that a map becomes irrelevant.

On a different aspect of prepping, my wife and I have worked out a series of Trigger Points that we hope will keep us out of the “Boiling Frog” scenario.   The Trigger Points that we monitor relate to social unrest, financial market tipping points, and worldwide systemic breakdowns.  We like to travel and sometimes do so for months at a time.  But we also carefully monitor our Trigger Points for the signal to move closer to the perimeter of our “shebang”, as we call our place of refuge.

 

  • Sat, Mar 05, 2011 - 02:33pm

    #39

    Jager06

    Status Bronze Member (Offline)

    Joined: Dec 03 2009

    Posts: 94

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    osb…

Good experience being shared, thanks osb.

I think trigger points are an excellent form of prepping. It is also indication of how serious folks when they are willing to take a look around and use non emotional data points to execute a plan.

That is something I would like to explore a bit more, what data points people have set, and why? I thought I had some data points set, but now that I think about it, maybe they aren’t the best.

I considered any consistent disruption in utilities, water, sewer, power and fuel to be a trigger, but now I realize maybe these more like roadsigns. Trigger what?

Is this a defensive or offensive mechanism for response?

What are the alternatives?

What makes that data set irrevocable, or what is it that forces an inevitable conclusion that requires an action?

If not permanent, then what are the data points that trigger a return to home and life under the new normal?

I tend to think in terms of small unit tactics and conflict, but putting the tea leaves together to avoid a confrontational experience, to gain distance, time and safety for the family for the worst case scenario are valid. I would much rather go on an extended camping trip to avoid a mass migration of hungry folks than have to be confrontational and combative to defend a potentially less than ideal situation.

So let me pose the question….Under what circumstances are YOU (yes you! reading this right now!) willing to abandon your position, your home, and move to a potentially safer location?

AND….What do you consider to be a safer location? Why?

This is of course, part of what you are doing to prep….and me too.

Best Wishes,

Jager06

  • Mon, Mar 07, 2011 - 02:23am

    #40

    Romans12.2

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    We have always thought that

We have always thought that if Detroit (40 miles east) starts rioting, we will leave and travel up North to cabin.  I’m not sure what else would make me leave where we are.  All our preps are here, chickens and gardens etc. What other triggers warrant leaving the metro areas of big cities?

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