Intensive Couples Health Weekend

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  • Sun, Dec 08, 2019 - 04:35pm   (Reply to #28)

    #31
    ao

    ao

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    mindset

I understand what you’re saying AK Granny but let me ask you this.  How successful is adopting a victim mindset in removing one from being a repeat victim in the future?  From my observation, not too successful.  The statement I made is in regards to the mindset one can benefit from, not what a dysfunctional society imposes upon one.  Also, I think we need to avoid conflating categorization for the purposes of measurement with categorization for the purposes of discrimination.  Are you saying these forms are for the purpose of discrimination?  Because, from what I see, they’re often for the exact opposite purpose.  But perhaps I’m wrong, not knowing for sure what’s in the mind of some statistic gathering government bureaucrat.

The people I see who regularly adopt the victim mindset, don’t break out from it too frequently, whether black, white, or whatever.  I’ve seen this societally and I’ve also seen this with both psychological and physical health.  The mind is a powerful thing.  As I stated elsewhere, Mind is the Builder and Mind is also the Destroyer.  We can take our pick which via our attitude and our actions.

I don’t know all the reasons for the out-sized incarceration rate in the US.  It is shameful for “the land of the free”.  But now it seems that statistic is being turned around to imply that the majority of incarcerations of black males are not justified.  I went to a high school that was about 25% black, lived through race riots, and lived on the boundary line between a white ghetto and a black ghetto while attending a university.  From personal experience, I can understand why so many black males are incarcerated.  Bad behavior typically results in bad consequences.  I even recall talking to a black acquaintance from Cameroon with two PhDs and a strong Christian upbringing, a highly educated and moral man, and found it interesting that he was appalled by the attitudes and behaviors of so many African Americans when he lived in Philadephia attending university there.  Many other highly successful black men who have broken out of the victim mindset and created their own destiny have observed that same thing.  Then, of course, there are the converse … the Al Sharptons who play upon the fears and emotions of their people while robbing them blind for their personal enrichment.

In answer to your final question, I reside in the land of self realization and eschew the land of victim hood.  You can do the same … or not … your choice.

  • This reply was modified 3 months, 3 weeks ago by ao.
  • Sun, Dec 08, 2019 - 05:07pm

    #32
    agitating prop

    agitating prop

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    Reply To: Intensive Couples Health Weekend

Blacks suffered disproportionately when manufacturing left the U.S. plus discrimination, lousy schools, and being cut off from access to capital in a capitalist society.

Your friend from Cameroon likely didn’t have the same types of difficulties. Difficulties yes, but of a different type.

I suggest you research the private prison industry to get a sense of just how bad and how demoralizing it has been to be black in your own country. A good place to start is delving into the conditions which led to the riots in Ferguson.

  • Sun, Dec 08, 2019 - 07:40pm   (Reply to #32)

    #33
    ao

    ao

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    re: Reply To: Intensive Couples Health Weekend

Can you provide evidence for blacks suffering disproportionately for when manufacturing left the US because whites suffered quite a bit as well to my recollection including my very own father and some of my uncles?

I attended the same high school as a substantial number of black students yet had a very different academic outcome from most of them which I can only attribute to different attitudes, different behaviors, different priorities, different motivations, etc.   Remember that schools and classes in schools are made by the students as much as by the faculty and the administration.  Therein lies the rub.  I also taught a course at Howard University and encountered black students who were highly motivated to learn and excel and had very positive outcomes, quite the opposite from the majority of those I encountered in high school.  So it’s not the color, it’s not the school, it’s the attitude and behavior.

Cut off from access to capital in a capitalist society?  One of the best ways to accumulate capital is to work and to manage one’s resources isely, no matter how modest.  Let me give you a personal example.  I’ve just finished moving my near 94 year old mother cross country to live with us (as opposed to having her live in assisted living).  My mother took care of me in my childhood and I consider it an honor and a privilege to be able to take care of her in her last years and not relegate her to some institution.  In the process, I’ve had to review her financial situation.  My father worked hard and long hours but at a very basic blue collar job not known for paying well while my mother stayed home and took care of us.  Yet my mother, with only a high school education and much to my surprise, managed to accumulate assets in the 7 figure range with her portfolio still intact at that level at this advanced age.  I also know of a number of other people, of the whole range of races and ethnicities, who worked at the same job and for the same pay as my father but many of those (still surviving) are much less well off with some of them complaining bitterly about their impoverished circumstances.  So were they cut off from capital but my mom and dad weren’t?

My friend from Cameroon had greater difficulties than most American blacks.  There are many obese black Americans.  How many obese black Africans are there?  Next to none.  Because many of them, including him, live or lived at a starvation or near starvation level, something almost no American black has experienced in recent years with food stamps, WIC programs, etc.  He lived in greater poverty than the vast majority of American blacks yet prevailed.  But regardless, since when do “difficulties”, of any type, justify bad behavior?

I know about the private prison industry.  But I also know the best way to stay out of prison is to not do anything wrong.  And despite the demoralization, it seems that folks like Barack Obama, Clarence Thomas, Erick Holder, Condoleezza Rice, Colin Powell, Ben Carson, Herman Cain, Thomas Sowell, and a host of others (including youngsters like Farrah Gray) have risen above that “demoralization”.

And, to my knowledge, the riots in Ferguson started over the shooting of the “gentle giant”, Michael Brown, not due to prison conditions.  You remember, that gentle Michael Brown who was “a good boy”.  The same one who tried to beat to death the cop that justifiably shot him and had his life unfairly destroyed as a consequence.  The same gentle giant who robbed a convenience store and roughed up the clerk in the process just a short time before he was shot.  The same gentle giant who was filmed on video stomping on the head and chest of an elderly black man and damn near killing him.  Yep, the death of that gentle giant triggered the riots.  Some justification, huh?

  • This reply was modified 3 months, 3 weeks ago by ao.
  • Sun, Dec 08, 2019 - 10:05pm

    #34
    agitating prop

    agitating prop

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    Lead up to Ferguson incidents

From the Atlantic Magazine

Instead, the cash-starved municipality relies on its cops and its courts to extract millions in fines and fees from its poorest residents, issuing thousands of citations each year.

Those tickets plug a financial hole created by the ways in which the city, the county, and the state have chosen to apportion the costs of public services.

A century or more of public-policy choices protect the wallets of largely white business and property owners and pass the bills along to disproportionately black renters and local residents.

It’s easy to see the drama of a fatal police shooting, but harder to understand the complexities of municipal finances that created many thousands of hostile encounters, one of which turned fatal.

https://www.theatlantic.com/politics/archive/2015/04/fergusons-fortune-500-company/390492/

  • Tue, Dec 10, 2019 - 05:45pm

    #35
    SmartTripper

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    thanks for taking a risk with this

Chris and Adam,

From my participation in two annual seminars and one self-defense hand gun course, I can see that you’ve attracted a wide variety of backgrounds in your audience, some living quite modestly, others are very-well heeled.  It’s very difficult to offer pertinent resiliency training that will suit the differing level of resources in the PP tribe.  Thank you for risking criticism and throwing out ideas.  You don’t have to hit the bullseye every time to be valuable to us.

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