- Background: The Author
- My Personal Year
- The Economy
- Broken Markets
- The FAANGs
- Bitcoin: Tales from the Crypt
- Real Estate
- Corporate Debt
- Personal Debt
- Sovereign Debt
- Inflation versus Deflation
- The Fed
- Links in Part 1
- Human Achievement
- Middle East
- Nerve Gas Poisoning
- Kavanaugh versus Blasey Ford
- Political Correctness–Adult Division
- Political Correctness–Collegiate Division
- Political Correctness–Youth Division
- Links in Part 2
“Opportunities don’t happen; you create them."
We are now transitioning from economics and markets to the political and social events of 2018. As noted at the outset, I have over a hundred pages of quotes, notes, and anecdotes about Trump, Russian collusion, and the nefarious activities going on in the Deep State. It has grown progressively harder to wrap my brain around what I am actually witnessing. I can no longer write a chapter or two. I may be able to write a book, but certainly not in the months of November or December. It is what it is. I have focused on what catches my eye and what is achievable.
Random topics that come across my field of view that I capture are loosely defined as "Human Achievement". Who could forget the heroics in Thailand as cave divers saved the Thai soccer team?ref 394 Buddhist teachings by their coach helped them cope with stress and lower their oxygen intake for two weeks. Two heroic cave divers found them.ref 395 Divers from around the world suffering from toxic masculinity—no pussy hats or man buns on those guys—pulled them out. Meanwhile, Elon Musk was show boating with a useless submarine and calling one of the heroes a pedophileref 396 and then gets sued.ref 397
Although watching sports is too time consuming for me, I catch a lot on the fly. 2018 had some unlikely sports heroes. A 36-year-old accountant, Scott Foster, was called to play goalie for the Winnepeg Jets. The night before he was playing rec league for "Johnny's Icehouse" and probably did so the following weekend. On that one memorable night, however, he played 14 scoreless minutes in the Big League.ref 398 A 32-year old rookie got called up to play for the LA Lakers, came off the bench, and drained 19 points.ref 399 (It's not quite like those six three-pointers by the autistic kid,ref 400 but it's still amazing.) The winning Superbowl coach was coaching high school football nine years earlier.ref 401 (Trivia point: years ago, Cornell fired one of a long string of marginally successful football coaches. He was George Seiferth. You can't get talent into the Ivies.) The Boss of the sports world was an approximately 12-year-old fan who, when handed a game ball by the infielder, had the smarts to give it to a seriously hot chick sitting behind him… but not before switching it with the ball he bought from Dicks Sporting Goods.ref 402 That's metagame.
The PyongChang Olympics had six Cornell alums (mostly women's hockey).ref 403 In my opinion, women's hockey is as good to watch as men's hockey. Meanwhile, American Elizabeth Swaney achieved everybody's dream by competing for Hungary in the half pipe while being awful—seriously wretchedly bad.ref 404 She spotted a seam in the rules that qualified her for the Olympics by amassing top-30 finishes at international events. She traveled the world competing in all half-pipe competitions with fewer than 30 entrants.ref 405
Other bulletable achievements included:
- Tiger won his first tournament since 2013. It's all about redemption.
- Jordan Bohannan tied Chris Street's University of Iowa record for most consecutive free throws, 34, that had withstood two decades. Chris had died in a car accident 3 days after graduation. Bohannan, stepping up to the line to set a new record, looked at his brother in the stands, bonked it against the iron, and pointed to the sky: "It was not my record to have." Superheroes don't always wear capes. I am tearing while I type.ref 406
- In March madness, #16 seeded UMBC beat #1 seed University of Virginia 74–54, busting every March Madness Bracket in the World.ref 407
- Drexel came back from a 34-point deficit, setting a new comeback record for Division I basketball.ref 408
- LA Tech football team lost 87 yards in a single play.ref 409
- Watch this kid play catcher; you wouldn't notice if I didn't tell you he has only one arm.ref 410(hotlink) I hope he applies to Cornell.
"I think the question we have to ask ourselves is this: What is the right way to behave to honor our sport and to respect our opponents?"
~Martina Navratilova, returning Serena Williams' serve
And then there were the darker moments. Serena Williams reached hero status by delivering her latest kid and in the blink of an eye making it to the finals of the US Open Singles Championship.ref 411 In the final match, however, a serious shitfit at the line judge put a dark smudge on the game. The authorities kowtowed (which is a Chinese term that translates to "acted like pussies"), causing much of the glory to be taken away from the winner, Naomi Osaka.ref 412 It wasn't Williams' first outburst.ref 413
And for some more Bullets from the Dark Side:
- Phil Michelson six putted (if you include the two-stroke penalty for whacking a moving ball) and then claimed (admitted) it was tactical to avoid an even worse outcome.ref 414 The Mets signed him because he could hit a moving ball.
- USA Gymnastics admitted it had more coverups of pedophilia than the Catholic Church.ref 415
- Khabib Nurmagomedov—Khabib for short and for obvious reasons—beat Conor McGregor in the UFC. (Khabibe literally wrestled grizzly bears as a kid,ref 416 so it was not a shock.) Risk was brought to a new level when a huge and arguably most dangerous sports brawl in history broke out.ref 417
- A Russian curler was charged with doping using a well-tracked substance.ref 418 Something is fishy…so many questions.
- Another female Russian Olympian donning a shirt stating, "I don't do doping" tested positive for doping.ref 419
- Nigerian soccer star Emmanuel Eminike divorced Miss Nigeria 2013 to marry Miss Nigeria 2014.ref 420
- The first zero-emissions solar-powered boat is said to be circumnavigating the globe this year.ref 412 Correct me if I am wrong but one of Magellan's zero-emissions wind-powered boats made it around some time back. Contrary to popular opinion, Magellan did not.
"The art world is the biggest joke going. It’s a rest home for the overprivileged, the pretentious, and the weak."
Away from sports, Banksy punked the art world when, seconds after the auction gavel fell on one of his $1 million paintings, a mechanism hidden in the frame shredded it.ref 422 The art world punked him back by declaring the painting's value just doubled.ref 423 A guy jumped from 25,000 feet without a parachute and landed "safely" in a net.ref 424 Another got the coveted hat trick when, after having been mauled by a bear and bitten by a rattlesnake, he got attacked by a shark.ref 425 While astronomers recorded the first video from the surface of an asteroid,ref 426 others identified a new type of aurora and named it "Steve".ref 427 Watch this girl playing a concerto on the violin with a prosthetic arm connected from her collar bone.ref 428 That is toxic femininity! This woman piloting a passenger jet has the engine blow off the plane and blew a hole in the plane sucking a passenger out. She displayed nerves of steel.ref 429(hotlink)
If you dig long and hard, you eventually find the bottom of the barrel. A couple raised $400,000 for a homeless vet and just squandered it before the courts could intervene.ref 430 The author of "How to Murder Your Husband" was arrested for allegedly murdering her husband.ref 431 A man who thought he was possessed by crocodile hunter Steve Irwin was arrested for tranquilizing and raping alligators.ref 432
In the non-hominid division, Beadnose (Bear #409) displayed impressive salmon-sourced cellulite, toppling the reigning champ, Otis (Bear #480), in Alaska's 2018 Fat Bear Championship (Figure 46).ref 433 The Flying Dog Championship witnessed a new jumping world record of 31 feet.ref 434 I'd like to see Beadnose try that.
Figure 46. Beadnose Bear at top feeding weight.
Had to save two for last. Ten players and two coaches of the Humboldt Broncos Youth Hockey Team coming from Humboldt, Saskatchewan were killed in a bus crash.ref 435 They were dominant on the ice. GoFundMe raised a $15 million memorial fund,ref 436 but I don't know how that town of 5,578 inhabitants will recover. RIP boys. (I'm tearing again.) Keep it in perspective folks.
You know all those fires in Boston that lit simultaneously due to an over-pressurized gas line (without a peep from the news questioning terrorism)?ref 437 My son was at the "red dot" chatting with me on the phone when they started. Like I said, keep it perspective.
"I know what it means to know something, and it's hard."
~Richard Feynman, physicist
Every year nature takes a bat to us in predictable and not-so-predictable ways. I have long stayed away from the global warming (or climate change, whatever) debate just because it is too rancorous, and I have little to offer. I once told the Secretary of Energy I was agnostic. After cleaning snot off my glasses I explained that I had not put in the 10,000 hours needed to form an educated opinion. For that matter, few have. Thus, all my colleagues in science with relatively few exceptions will sign off on the notion of anthropomorphic global warming with what is a vote of confidence in their scientific brethren but inadequate self study, providing an overstated scientific consensus. Here's what I will say. There are highly credible scientists on both sides now, not just whackadoodles looking for ten minutes of fame. I was shocked when I started Googling some of the deniers on this list to find out they they are both prominent and disbelievers.ref 438 Let me be equally clear because I am a wuss and so you don't hang some PC label on my sorry butt:
If I had to bet a paycheck, I would bet anthropogenic global warming is real. If I had to bet ten paychecks, I would bet that we are going to do the experiment despite the best intentions of those who worry. Resource depletion is what scares me.
Let me make one important point: you can't watch the weather or make any anecdotal observations and say, "See. I told you so. You guys are full of crap." You sound like an idiot to anybody who is not an idiot (unless you are being a snarky punk, which is fine). Hundreds of hurricanes have hit North America in the last century; nothing says the last 20 are anthropogenic. Snow in October and warm days in January mean nothing:
"This week in 1936, North Dakota was 121 degrees. This week in 1913, California was 134 degrees. This week in 1901, hundreds of New Yorkers died in the streets from the heat."
The warming trend, even if raging and eventually creates wind chill factors of 114 °F, is well inside the detection limits of simple human observation. With 365 days in a year, 100 years in a century, and more metrics of weather than pregnant teenagers, do you know how easy it is to break an all-time record? Those who claim to see patterns are being Fooled by Randomness. And the celebrities all know there is global warming. Remember when the star in TV medical drama "Quincy, M.E.", Jack Klugman, testified to Congress about health care? Most celebrities are idiots as are members of Congress. Why do you think they didn't study robotics or bioengineering? Only good science supported by good data analysis can tease signal from the noise. And what may prove to be the most ironic part of the global warming debate is that NASA scientists have found that a "big crack opened in the Earth's magnetic field and plasma started pouring in."ref 439 Meanwhile, a disturbing lack of sun spots and solar flares suggest an impending mini ice age is coming.ref 440 "Men plan, God laughs" or as Emily Litella would say, "Never mind."
Why don't I worry about climate change? It is for practical reasons. Humans are not proactive; they follow the Law of the Commons, also known as the Law of Selfish Bastards. Look how happy the French are after being told they will get to pay a nominal energy tax to stop global warming. There was some serious heat on the streets of gay ol' Paris. We are going to do the experiment.
We had lots of hurricanes this year, with Hurricane Michael being the headline grabber. As it wiped out Mexico Beach, Florida,ref 441 it appears to have whacked a handful of our stealth bombers inside a hanger.ref 442 Although there is a nice tutorial on why not every stealth bomber can be moved on short notice,ref 443 it's less obvious why you would store billions of dollars worth of hardware in a hanger that was not hurricane proof. Moving on to Hurricane Florence and North Carolina, we find that only 3% of homeowners have flood insurance and those that do also have counterparty risk; the Federal program providing flood insurance is $20 billion in the hole.ref 444 On a funny note, Hurricane Florence appeared to be ravaging a reporter struggling to hold his ground against gale-force winds to get a story…until two guys strolled by in shorts:ref 445
Figure 47. Risking life and limb.
Of course, fooled by randomness applies to other events like activity on the Ring of Fire. For those not paying attention, we are not talking about a Bangkok-hot curry but rather the ring circumnavigating the Pacific Ocean loaded with volcanic and other geological events. Seems to be acting up a lot lately. This year's Hawaiian volcano reminded homeowners that their houses built on formerly red hot lava might get squeegeed away, and they may no longer own ocean front property. Where some see disaster others see opportunities: can you buy futures on land that is not yet above sea level? I also waited with bated breath for Paul Krugman to write about his "broken pineapple fallacy". The Yellowstone caldera—an ancient super volcano—keeps rising a lot and spewing reminders that rare events happen.ref 446 By the way, "Krakatoa" by Simon Winchester is a great book and offers a fascinating description of plate tectonics.
The anti-vaxxers may have a case, but the evidence against a number of claims is profound (convinced me). I have zero doubt that, all things considered, vaccinations save lives. In regions where anti-vaccination campaigns have gotten legs, we are starting to see epidemics reappearing for the first time in many years.ref 447 Disturbingly, polio has reappeared in Venezuela.ref 448 I guess we didn't eradicate it after all. I'd be vaccinating against that one. The only thing that scared me as a kid were (a) my Dad's stink-eye, and (b) images of iron lungs and polio wards:
Contrary to popular opinion, scientists in Big Pharma would love to cure diseases; there is no conspiracy there. Popular opinion is also correct that marketing teams will try to get you to snarf down as much healthcare as theoretically possible. We continue to be seriously outnumbered in our battle against bacteria. I think those in the know are worried. Bacterial resistance to antibiotics is appearing before the drugs hit the marketplace. They are becoming non-cost effective to produce. At the street level, new flesh-eating bacterial infections of the genitals are somehow linked to best-selling diabetes drugs, causing the flesh around the genitals to literally rot away.ref 449 The CDC is now warning of an antibiotic-resistant strain of gonorrhea.ref 450 An oral cancer epidemic in men is linked to oral sex.ref 451 The message is clear: abstain. A mind-controlling parasite—yes, these things are precedented in biology and can have wildly cool effects on animal behavior—has been found in cat feces.ref 452 If you are eating cat feces you now officially have shit for brains. On the bright side, the virus has been linked with an almost reckless entrepreneurial spirit (not joking). It has been identified and named Elon Muskovitis (joking).
Of course, Nature's wrath amplified by Man's poor judgment was on full display as fires ravaged California. I was in a house fire in high school; I jumped out of a second story window into –2 °F weather buck naked (but who hasn't done that a few times.) People are dying from watching TV shows about fires. You have seconds to get the hell out. When your neighborhood is on fire, get out. Pepperdine University made the call to leave all students on campus.ref 453 That could have been a tragedy of a higher order. Some criticize the administration for commandeering the resources of all firefighters in the area. Others criticize them for doing it on purpose to ensure the university was protected. It is an interesting hypothesis, but I cannot fathom that level of sociopathy, even at a university.
I watch people lamenting the loss of their house and memories and think, "You're alive, your belongings were tacky, and your memories are safe in the cloud. Get over it." It is altogether different, however, when your house, school, church, stores, and employer burn to a crisp like in the ironically named Paradise, California. You really do have nothing now. It's not Yemen, but it's bad. There are regions in California that got one inch of rain since May in a much more secular (multi-year) draught. It was only a matter of time. I have read that the 20th century was the wettest of the last ten centuries in the State of California. It seems possible that millions moved into a desert without realizing the consequences.
Humans are a durable lot; they do not take guff from Mother Nature without a fight. In a battle against the weather, Volkswagen shoots off "hail cannons" near their Mexican factory to prevent formation of car-damaging hail stones, denying Mexican farmers rain for their crops.ref 453 We managed to finally exterminate the last white rhino because, well, who needs another large mammal that doesn't even make good stew meat.ref 455 Round-up is suggested to not only be solving our weed problem, but also eradicating those damned bees.ref 456 I'm sure Monsanto will figure out how to pollinate everything at some nominal cost. We are winning the war against sea creatures by filling the oceans with remarkable heaps of single-use plastic, generating an enormous wad of crap called the Great Pacific Garbage Patch.ref 457 The Chinese are rumored to be planning condos or a military base.
“We’re going to take down seven countries in five years. We’re going to start with Iraq, then Syria, Lebanon, then Libya, Somalia, Sudan. We’re going to come back and get Iran in five years.”
~Wesley Clark, Four-star general in 2002, quoting a peer
According to Ellen Brown, none of these countries is "listed among the 56-member banks of the Bank for International Settlements (BIS). That evidently puts them outside the long regulatory arm of the central bankers’ central bank in Switzerland. The most renegade of the lot could be Libya and Iraq, the two that have actually been attacked." And from an interview long, long ago…
Lesley Stahl: "We have heard that half a million children have died. I mean, that's more children than died in Hiroshima. And, you know, is the price worth it?"
Madeleine Albright: "I think this is a very hard choice, but the price — we think the price is worth it."
That 1996 60 Minutes exchange hasn't aged well.ref 458 In the sequel, we pick up the plotline in the same country by following the antics of Bush the Younger. Press secretary Ari Fleisher referred to it as "Operation Iraq Liberation",ref 459 somehow not seeing a problem with the acronym. I find our Middle East policy to be confounding except for one guiding principle: keep them all fighting. It is not really about oil but about war and banking. Following the collapse of the Soviet Union our multi-trillion-dollar defense industry needed a new foe. (Bombing Canada was a non-starter.) As we mow through conflict after conflict it all makes sense if you assume that our goal is to keep the Middle East in a perpetual state of war. Quadafi gets too strong? Kill him. Assad gets too strong, throw a false flag and bomb him. We also don't hesitate to remind those that we haven't bombed (yet) about the merits of the petrodollar: we agree to buy oil in dollars and, in return, they agree to fund our federal deficit and prop our asset markets with these dollars.
In case it isn't obvious, we don't really like democracies. As The Donald showed in 2016, we don't know how to control them. We are having issues with that will-of-the-people malarkey. They're tolerable for Europe but less developed regions—the shithole countries as the Donald is known to say—require focused targets for bribes and threats of death and dismemberment. Dictators are optimal—Shahs for example—but a small gaggle of warlords is manageable. Stephen Kinzer's Overthrow describes 13 explicit US-backed coups that overturned foreign leaders, including democratically elected ones.ref 460
Our adventures in the Middle East have cost us an estimated $6 trillion dollars. Some is salary paid to soldiers but most is going to companies as part of our No Defense Contractor Left Behind Program (NDCLBP). Take a look at the price chart of Boeing, Lockheed Martin, Halliburton, Raytheon, or any other defense contractor (Figure 48). They are well bid based on both past and future earnings. Trump promised to be the least militaristic president—a low bar—and then increased our military budget.
Figure 48. Share price of Boeing
The Saudi regime is ruthless. They fly planes into buildings, chuck gays out of windows, and behead people for non-violent crimes. Women are tortured who dare to drive a car, remove their hijabs, or have the audacity to get raped. If you are the wrong person in Saudi Arabia, Islamophobia is not even a theoretical construct because the fear is not irrational. You wanna see a hero in the flesh? She's Iranian (not Saudi), quite possibly dead, but now an iconic image of global feminism, a meme:
Figure 49. Principled when it's neither cool nor safe.
Meanwhile the Saudis are slaughtering Yemenis (Houthis specifically), risking starvation of as many as 18 million of them.ref 461 Let's go to CNN headquarters to get the latest on the global uproar:ref 462
Rand Paul: "We are refueling the Saudi bombers. So we are essentially part of the Saudi campaign. We are helping them choose targets. It is said that thousands of civilians have died in Yemen because of this. Yes, we need to have a debate over this."
Wolf Blitzer: "So for you this is a moral issue cause, as you know, there are a lot of jobs at stake certainly if a lot of these defense contractors stop selling war planes, other sophisticated equipment to Saudi Arabia. There’s going to be a significant loss of jobs and revenue in the United States. That’s secondary in your standpoint."
The stark truth of that must-see exchange slathered with latent sociopathy leaves me gagging on my vomit. The Pentagon insists we are minimizing civilian casualties when it's just infanticide masquerading as politics. "OK guys: let's keep it under 18 million if we can." US foreign policy is fostering this carnage by providing the Saudis with "the engines of death." You can blame Trump but don't you dare blame just Trump.
Enter one Washington Post journalist named Khashoggi. He gets suckered into an embassy, sliced into pieces, and fed to the camels.ref 463,464 The journalists kicked it into gear and denounced the horror.
"You gonna eat that?"
~Jeff Dahmer to Mohammed bin Salman
Here is my very unpopular take: It was a bit gruesome, but not by Saudi standards that we enthusiastically tolerate. He is also just one damned journalist. Let's put this in perspective: 18 million dying Yemenis versus One Dead Kashoggi (ODK). The world has gone collectively sociopathic on this one. You know why y'all care about some guy whose name you didn't even know six months ago and still can't spell? It is, in part, because Journalists Lives Matter (JLM), and psychopaths in high places are telling journalists to tell you what to worry about. Wake up or shut up. Let's get those priorities in order. And as happened before, Nassim and I have locked arms once again:
"A single journalist is a tragedy; ten thousand Yemenis is a statistic".
~Nassim Taleb channeling Joseph Stalin
Epilogue: The journalists are now starting to notice the carnage in Yemen. Alas, it was never about Khashoggi or Yemen. They are just chess moves.
“We’ll be coming out of Syria, like, very soon. Let the other people take care of it now.”
“A new confirmed chemical attack in Syria would pose a dilemma for President Trump, who … recently said he wants to get the United States out of Syria.”
"Just so there's no confusion here, if the Syrian regime uses chemical weapons we will respond very strongly, and they really ought to think about this a long time."
Three days after Trump's announced pull out there was a chlorine gas attack attributed to Assad. That is some serious bad luck. A leaked 2006 memo shows we have been trying to "election monitor" and destabilize Syria for quite some time.ref 435 For several years I have been writing about false flag attacks under the Obama administration trying to georelocate Assad's remains across the Levant. A Sputnik article predicted fake chlorine gas attacks were imminent.ref 466
Figure 50. 2014 Department of State tweet declaring "Mission Accomplished: "Heckuva a job Johnny!"
A disturbing trend is that those pulling off such scams are getting sloppy, relying increasingly on simply controlling the press coverage. There are, however, rogue pundits who refuse to play along. Seymour Hersh declared the chlorine attacks and anti-Syrian rhetoric to be a crock.ref 467 Tucker Carlson, as he so often does now, stepped out on a limb and gave a brilliant must-see diatribe denouncing the neocons for marching us toward a military conflict.ref 468 Pat Buchanan joined with the doubters.ref 469 And, of course, Russia’s Ambassador to the EU in Syria declared it was a complete farce, a hoax concocted by the ‘white helmets’ to justify US forces to bomb Assad.ref 470 I did an RT interview on the chlorine gas attacks as follow up to the Skripal poisonings (see "Nerve Gas Poisonings"). I was so brain dead trying to keep it all straight that I Freudian slipped into a Skripal poisoning plotline before the interviewer reeled me in.ref 471 German Chancellor Angela Merkel denounced the attacks as evidence we failed to eradicate Assad's chemical arsenal, but Germany refused to enter the fray.ref 472 British ambassador to the United Nations, Karen Pierce, blamed the Russians of course.ref 473 (She must have slipped plotlines too.)
Social media dismembered the story. You would have time to run from the house, admittedly coughing and feeling really crappy, maybe even dying later.ref 474 The stacks of bodies inside the house smelled wrong, and the notable absence of sick survivors was odd.ref 475 The bodies were in different states of decay, showed assorted traumas, and displayed blood accumulating in the wrong places. (I'm sure there are Middle Eastern startups that provide bodies on-demand—there is no shortage—but the quality control might be lacking.) Most tellingly, the same bodies were being recycled for different photos.ref 476 One kid claimed he was walking along the street (probably staring at his cell phone), grabbed without warning, and hosed down in front of camera-wielding observers capturing his ordeal.ref 477 An intrepid western reporter, Robert Fisk, actually went to the scene—I'm surprised too—and found nobody knew about the attacks.ref 478 That's a special kind of PTSD. The public seems to not buy into these stories. Mike Krieger of LibertyBlitz blog caught a Fox News Twitter poll asking whether people were for or against attacking Syria because of the chlorine gas attack.ref 479 With 49,000 votes tallied—a non-shabby sample size—69% did not support action. Within two hours, 140,000 pro war supporters joined in and supported the attacks (Figure 51). We are all getting duped.
Figure 51. Fox poll swinging wildly (h/t @LibertyBlitz)
Who are these "unarmed and impartial" good Samaritans—these caped crusaders—known as the "White Helmets" who clean up the messes caused by pro-Assad bad guys?ref 480 They are called the Syrian Self-Defense Group. Max Blumenthal, a journalist with considerable experience in the Middle East, calls them a "shadowy group" who also appear to be creating the messes (the arsonist-firefighter combo platter.)ref 481 White Helmeted caped crusaders by day, dark villain mad bombers by night. According to Max, the group is part of a well-funded larger organization called the United States Agency for International Development (USAID) that travels the globe intervening in places like Cuba and Venezuela. The Netherlands figured this out and pulled their support.ref 482
I repeat my original assertion: our interest in the Middle East is more about war than oil. Eisenhower nailed it in his farewell address.ref 483 It's about money and power—the military-industrial complex. I found this Creature from Jekyll Island-like documentary about banking and war to be entertaining.ref 484
A former colonel in Russian military intelligence who turned MI6 agent and his daughter Yulia were found unconscious on a public bench in Salisbury, England. Headlines flashed that a novichok-class nerve agent put the Skripals into comas. They eventually recovered and were whisked away to a secret location for their safety.ref 485 This is just spy versus spy stuff at best, but Prime Minister Theresa May and the British authorities were quick to condemn the Rooskies:
"It is now clear that Mr. Skripal and his daughter were poisoned with a military-grade nerve agent of a type developed by Russia. This is part of a group of nerve agents known as novichok. Based on the positive identification of this chemical agent by world-leading experts at the Defense Science and Technology Laboratory at Porton Down, our knowledge that Russia has previously produced this agent and would still be capable of doing so."
~Theresa May, Prime Minister of the UK
This is a heap of Moose and Squirrel feces. "Hey. There's novichok in the mass spectrum; let's start World War III!" The authorities were lying their asses off. The hyperbolic language—"military grade" to distinguish it from the crap sold at Walmart—and the suggestion that only the Rooskies know how to make it is hogwash. These novichoks are some of the simplest organic molecules with biological activity.ref 486 They are no harder to synthesize than Tylenol, so I called them out:
Although that tweet got picked up later,ref 487 it was crickets at the time. As the international sabers began to rattle loudly, I took another Tweet at it:
"That Russia Tweet was a fkn DAISY CUTTER man you are controversial. I applaud it."
~Tony Greer, @TGMacro
That "f*cking daisy cutter" did the trick. It was all over the international press that a Cornell chemist threw a flag. As a nouveau Roosky apologist I found myself on George Galloway, Russia Today (RT),ref 488 Stranahan and Nixon on Faultlines,ref 489 Scott Horton,ref 490 and a missed opportunity to hit Al Jazeera. I was warned by nervous Cornell authorities about the propaganda machine RT, to which I asked, "Worse than CNN?" It also brought Tweeters into my feed from intelligence organizations prompting me to STFU.
The UK authorities say that the incidents in Amesbury and Salisbury are linked, but Professor of Chemistry at Cornell University, Dave Collum, told RT that “it’s impossible to make a connection as there’s been no data presented” to the public to back those claims. He also reiterated that London’s statements of only Russia being capable of producing the novichok chemical were “totally false.” He described the nerve agent as “a simple compound,” which is actually just “three steps from commercially available materials." “I’ve put it on a final exam in my course… and they [the students] all got full credit. It was so easy, I knew none would lose credit because it’s like asking a bunch of bakers to make chocolate chip cookie recipe,” the US chemist said.
The boys and girls at Britain's Porton Down—the nerve center of the UK chemical weapons program(me)—refused to finger the Rooskies,ref 492 causing the rhetoric to target motive:
"There is no doubt the nerve agent used in the attack was the military-grade nerve agent from the Novichok series. This has been confirmed by specialists, our specialists,…There is also no doubt that the Novichok was produced in Russia by the Russian state. Russia has investigated ways of delivering nerve agents likely for assassination purposes. Part of this programme has involved producing quantities of Novichok agents. The fact that the Novichok was produced in Russia and the fact that Russia has a history of state-sponsored assassinations and the fact that Russia has responded with the usual playbook of disinformation and denial left us with no choice but to conclude that this amounts to an unlawful use of force by the Russian state against the United Kingdom. All of the UK's actions have been fully consistent with our obligations under the Chemical Weapons Convention."
~Dr. Laurie Bristow, British Ambassador to Russia
Who had the skill and motivation? Russia and any country interested in making it look like Russia did. That narrows it down to pretty much every sovereign state in the World, including, in the vernacular, the "shitholes." According to a private communication from a physicist in Finland, novichoks appear to have been made by the US, Iran, UK, Canada, Czech Republic, France, Israel, Sweden, The Netherlands, and Germany. The head of the military laboratory said his lab had made 'novichok'-related chemicals for testing. His statement was called "unfortunate" by the country's Prime Minister, and then he got fired.ref 493
To test my theory that it was easy to make, I put a question on the final exam of my first-year graduate-level organic chemistry course:
Figure 52. 2018 Final exam in Chem 6660, Synthetic Organic Chemistry.
All got full credit except one kid who obviously will never cut it as a terrorist. It's worse than that: I think you could pour the four critical ingredients in a bucket simultaneously and end up with a punch that would flatten way more than just a bunch of fraternity brothers (at Yale). These nerve agents weren't state secrets: their structures were reported in an eight dollar bookref 494 (that apparently only the Russians can afford) or, if you are particularly tech savvy, Wikipedia.ref495
I wasn't standing alone in my doubt. Craig Murray, former UK ambassador to Uzbekistan, was screaming at the top of his lungs.ref 496 The Spiez Laboratory at the Swiss Federal Institute for NBC-Protection, a division of the Federal Office for Civil Protection, got a sample and claimed it wasn’t even a novichok that whacked the Skripals but rather a substance used by the United States, the United Kingdom, and other NATO states.ref 497 Seymour Hersh didn't buy it:ref 498 “When the intel community wants to say something they say it…High confidence effectively means that they don’t know." Famous British journalist, John Pilger, called the Skripal poisoning "total bolox" and wondered "Why do we journalists write down what governments tell us?"ref 499 (That's a trick question: they are made men and women, many of whom on payroll.) The Ron Paul Institute noted that the British claim of Russian assassinations "reads like another desperate repetition of the falsehoods and insults towards Russia issued by Theresa May’s lame-duck Government."ref 500 The most interesting theory is that the Skripals got shell-fish poisoning from a seafood restaurant they ate at that day.ref 501
The Rooskies blamed Porton Down, which is only eight miles from Salisbury and had recently cut 132 staff (motive), prompting their spokesperson to say, “There’s no way that anything like that would ever have come from us or leave the four walls of our facilities.”ref 502 The internet sleuths dug in. Nobody could understand how a contaminated door nob at the Skripals could fail to kill the Skripals—there is a non-lethal dose, of course, so that logic is wrongref 503—and why nobody else got sick.ref 504 Before long, Skripal was being connected to the Steele Dossier.ref 505 I am not joking. I dissed that idea until more evidence emerged.ref 506
"One should be mindful that the chemical components or precursors of A-232 or its binary version novichok-5 are ordinary organophosphates that can be made at commercial chemical companies that manufacture such products as fertilizers and pesticides."
~Ex-Soviet Scientistref 507
This ex-Soviet scientist who wrote "the book" on Soviet nerve agents was remarkably obtuse, seemingly playing both sides.ref 508 Go figure. One exchange was particularly entertaining:
Mirzayanov: It is obvious to me that Moscow hoped that no one would catch them.
Interviewer: But you published the formula for novichoks eight years ago.
Mirzayanov: I don’t know if the FSB [Russia's security group] saw my book.
As the story began to die down and people were left pondering the whereabouts of Yulia Skripal—maybe with that Vegas security guard?—it happened again. Another couple in Salisbury got poisoned supposedly by somebody filling her Chanel perfume dispenser with eau du novichok.ref 509 She died; he recovered. Theresa May was at it again:
“No other country has a combination of the capability, the intent, and the motive to carry out such an act.”
~ Prime Minister Theresa May on the Salisbury poisonings
“Mr Speaker, we are quite clear that Russia was responsible for this act. As I set out for the House in my statements earlier this month, our world-leading experts at the Defense Science and Technology Laboratory at Porton Down positively identified the chemical used for this act as a Novichok – a military-grade nerve agent of a type developed by the Soviet Union. We know that Russia has a record of conducting state-sponsored assassinations and that it views some former intelligence officers as legitimate targets for these assassinations. And we have information indicating that within the last decade, Russia has investigated ways of delivering nerve agents probably for assassination, and, as part of this programme, has produced and stockpiled small quantities of Novichoks.”
~Theresa May on the Salisbury poisonings
This time they rounded up a couple of Roosky assassins, but that story began to fall apart almost immediately. The two patsies were fingered by two officers who were said to have a "rare skill in memorizing faces."ref 510 Hokey Smokes, Bullwinkle: now the are just lying like teenagers. The residue detected in the assassins' hotel room found two months later could not be detected the following day.ref 511 That's not how chemistry works, folks. As they separately walked down the jetway at the airport a camera caught them at the exact same position in the jetway with the exact same time stamp to the second (Figure 53).ref 512 If they were even a second apart, one picture would necessarily show two men. Camera's showed them walking around London far away from the crime scene minutes before the putative crime, walking in the wrong direction.ref 513 The camera angles were also wrong.ref 514 If this was a Russian hit, they have lost their groove; real assassins get the job done (bumper sticker). One disturbingly knowledgeable tweeter noted that serious assassins have an independent team do the reconnaissance.
Figure 53. Fake photos showing two spies at the same place at the same time.
So what is it all about? More sanctions. More Russophobia. More demonizing of Putin. The New Cold War. Theresa May’s Government imposed sanctions on Russia, including the expulsion of 23 diplomats.ref 515 While France refused to play along,ref 516 the US chummed the water:
"This attack on our Ally the United Kingdom put countless innocent lives at risk and resulted in serious injury to three people, including a police officer…To the Russian government, we say, when you attack our friend you will face serious consequences."
~US State Department's Official Statement
The Russians weren't happy:
"The Skripal poisoning was not an incident but a colossal international provocation… Any threat to take ‘punitive’ measures against Russia will meet with a response. The British side should be aware of that."
~Maria Zakharova, Russian Foreign Ministry Spokeswoman
“I simply don’t have any normal terms left to describe all this…expulsions won't go unanswered…I said that the United States took a very bad step by cutting what very little still remains in terms of Russian-American relations."
~Sergei Lavrov, Russian Foreign Minister
Rob Slane of Blogmire blog summed up the situation nicely:ref 517
"It’s all remarkably clever, and it seems to have been specifically designed to generate the impression to the uninitiated that investigators are simply making it up as they go along.”
Any Russian will tell you that when things look bleak, drink vodka. A Bristol distillery promptly offered a new product, "Novichok Edition." Staggering from withering criticism, they found themselves apologizing, as often happens when alcohol is involved.ref 518
“We now live in an age that risks a new form of sexual McCarthyism. . . The best way of assuring that we don’t is to accord every person, regardless of his status, the kind of fundamental fairness we would expect for ourselves if we were accused.”
~Alan Dershowitz, Harvard University
At risk of life, limb, and all forms of appendages, although I punted the ball on a lot of political topics this year, I've got to write about the Kavanaugh hearings because I believe the casual observer missed most of the plot. Quick disclaimer: As a pro-choice atheist I probably have a few bones to pick with Kavanaugh’s politics. Highly respected journalist Ambrose Evans-Pritchard described his dealings with Kavanaugh in unflattering terms years back during the Vince Foster and Whitewater investigations.ref 519,520 (That just got weird fast.) Unfortunately, hearings that were supposed to vet his credentials to be a Supreme Court justice were reduced to one simple question: Is Brett Kavanaugh a drunken serial rapist? Kinda gives me pause.
The protests against Kavanaugh began the minute his nomination was announced. Protesters hired by companies like Crowds on Demand to “astroturf” any issueref 521,522 sifted through stacks of signs opposing all possible nominees to pull out the anti-Kavanaugh signs.ref 523 As the story goes, Christina Blasey Ford (CBF) contacted Senator Dianne Feinstein about a sexual assault by Kavanaugh when she was 15. The details were both sketchy and fluid, possibly because she had forgotten about the whole affair until 2012 counseling sessions dredged up suppressed memories.ref 524 Feinstein paid for a lie detector test and then sat on the story until the time was right to pounce. I suspect that CBF thought she could drop a quick grenade and move on to a new career as a decidedly elevated heroine of the progressive community. As so often happens, all bets are off once the first shots are fired. Her name was leaked, and the journalists were off and running.
Reinforcements showed up. A woman claimed Kavanaugh swaffled her in the face at Yale, but she was decidedly fuzzy on details and it was a bit late to swab her face for DNA.ref 525 Another showed up with the Lawyer of the Porn Stars, Michael Avenatti, claiming she witnessed a dozen Kavanaugh-sponsored gang rapes until she realized how self-incriminating that sounded.ref 526 In an odd coincidence, she had previously filed a sexual harassment suit against New York Life . . . using the attorneys representing CBF.ref 527 (Wait. It gets weirder.) She and Avenatti are now under investigation for bearing false witness.ref 528 A guy claimed he witnessed Kavanaugh rape a woman on a boat until the FBI entered the scene. He lost his bearings fast and found himself out on the gangplank.ref 529 A new Jane Doe sent an anonymous letter describing being raped by Kavanaugh in a car, but she’s now not-so-anonymously heading for an altogether different hearing after admitting it was a fib and that she had never met him but was pissed off.ref 530 NBC knew that at least one of his accusers was lying like a dog but ran with the story anyway.ref 531 I’m old enough to remember when NBC was staffed by respected journalists.
“We have already reviewed your client’s allegations. We focus on credible allegations. Please stop emailing me.”
~Mike Davis, U.S. Senate Committee on the Judiciary, to Michael Avenatti
Kavanaugh detractors asked inane rhetorical questions like, “Why would they lie?” You just can't fix stupid I guess. The anti-Kavanaugh #MeToo team submitted that all those accusers, no matter how non-credible when in isolation, couldn’t all be lying. Recall that over 100 people found syringes in their Pepsi cans.ref 532 Why would they lie? They were all convicted of fraud. The pundits seemed to forget that rapists are determined by 12 of their peers in courts of law. With the accusers’ stories getting scalded by the light of day as non-hyperbolically summarized by The Weekly Standard,ref 533 David French,ref 534 Byron York,ref 535 and others.ref 536 the future of the Supreme Court came down to just two people in an epic he said–she said battle in the Congressional Octagon.
“I only drank beer to excess one time in college. When? If I’m remembering right, it was from 1977 to 1981.”
~Andrew C. McCarthy, contributing editor of the National Review
“I do not believe that the temperament of Kavanaugh can be judged from this one, unique circumstance. He was accused, among other things, of leading a virtual rape gang in high school. That would leave most people rather ticked and angry.”
~Jonathan Turley, constitutional law scholar at George Washington University
Kavanaugh threw early punches trying to make the case in a pre-game interview that he was a choirboy, but nobody bought it. His yearbook showed an amazing résumé but included jargon-rich comments typical of young men, showing he might have been a hooligan at an all-boys prep school. Allusion to a girl dubbed “Renate Alumnius” mentioned by name only (except to those who do not know what that semi-colon thingie is) was inferred as evidence that she was a favorite among the boys—a slut in the vernacular—but she was also one of the 65 female signers of a letter of support saying they knew Kavanaugh and he was honorable.ref 537 Police records from New Haven showed that Kavanaugh may have chucked a glass of ice on somebody at a bar while at Yale.ref 538 That proto-ice bucket challenge was morphed into a violent-drunk plotline. CBF had a yearbook too that was scrubbed but retrieved by the WayBack Machine.ref 539 It is said to be salacious, but I didn't bother to look; it's not relevant.
During the hearings Kavanaugh threw what appeared to be tantrums. I think they were ill-advised in retrospect, but I have no doubt that they were advised, not just spontaneous outbursts. Many say his bahavior was unbecoming of a judicial nominee. Here's how I see: If I am being falsely accused of such heinous crimes, I would get so medieval that my next hearings would be in a court of law looking at serious time spent in a condo that locks from the outside.
“There is something deeply unsettling in the scene of a United States senator going through the yearbook entries written by a teenage boy in High School as a material issue for a confirmation to the United States Supreme Court.”
In a matter of a few months, Kavanaugh had been reduced from the lofty position of Supreme Court nominee to mean, beer-guzzling gang rapist displaying violent mood swings. As to the accused assault of CBF, he pulled out a calendar showing that he was out of town when the alleged assault took placeref 540 and has acute CCHD (compulsive calendar hoarding disorder). The dog piling came from every direction and was astonishing. USA Today accused him of being a pedophile (Figure 54). The American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU) committed $1 million dollars to keep a Supreme Court nominee off the court. Wrap your brain around that irony. Kavanaugh’s current employer, Harvard University, managed to start a Title IX charge against him and implied that if he did not get confirmed, he would be unemployed.ref 541
Figure 54. Fair and balanced
The battle was fierce. Lindsey Graham put on a now-legendary tirade:ref 542
“This is the most unethical sham since I've been in politics. . . . Boy, y'all want power. Boy, I hope you never get it. I hope the American people can see through this sham, that you knew about it and you held it.”
~Lindsey Graham, US Senator from South Carolina
Oddly enough, the media immediately began omitting, “Boy, y’all want power. Boy, I hope you never get it.” I think it had a little too much truthiness.
The day of CBF's testimony finally arrived, and what a show! Rachel Mitchell, the questioner with 25 years’ experience prosecuting sex crimes, allowed the skanky old white guys with sordid pasts and taxpayer-funded slush funds to bribe their own victimsref 543 to sit back and watch. The PTSD that caused CBF to forget the entire event until it was resurrected by therapy in 2012 gave way to lurid details with “100% confidence.”ref 544 She described how she had a second door installed in her house out of feelings of insecurity from the decades-old event and leaving family members baffled at what was going on in her head. Even flying was said to be a horrifying experience. CBF described her lie detector test as a bewildering new experience. Mitchell followed up with an equally bewildering question as to whether CBF had ever helped anybody else take one.ref 545 WTF was that about? Hold that thought. Mitchell subsequently summarized her concerns in a letter,ref 546 concluding that CBF’s testimony did not pass Mitchell’s smell test (although the GOP did hire her.) The court of popular opinion had a few opinions of its own, expressed in thoughtful, measured tones:
The press referred to her testimony as emotional, gripping, compelling. She described the trauma of being thrown on a bed and barely escaping. So what is the problem here? Let’s just hang the bastard. I’m gonna open big: I don’t care what all the sycophantic virtue-signalizing pundits had to say, CBF was not credible. I know enormous numbers of women in academics. They all have gravitas. Teaching anywhere from 40 to >100 lectures a semester grooms stage presence and amplifies the gravitas. Her résumé shows that she is rather accomplished.ref 547 Although I could quibble over factual errors in what she said (and there were a quite a fewref 548) the problem was in the presentation. She spoke like a 9-year-old girl, a rather pathetic one at that. We all had childhood memories that were ruined by our childhood, and then we #moveon. I grew up with a drunk mother—a face-in-her-mashed-potatoes drunk mother. It groomed independence. Oh, now I can hear you saying, “But Dave, you privileged punk: You've never been sexually assaulted," and you would be wrong. When I was about 8 years old—even unresurrected memories get a little fuzzy in detail—my brother and I were molested by an eye doctor named Dr. McGraw who grabbed our nuts for an hour straight. “First or second? I’ll take neither, you goddamned perv!” If I had been a little older, I probably could have reshaped his Prince Albert with a ball-peen hammer. Instead, we told my dad, ate dinner (probably mashed potatoes), and sat down to an episode of Mr. Ed (“Willlburrrrrr”).
When a well-known voice actress called out CBF’s fake voice—her “fry”—on YouTube, the actress was promptly fired.ref 549 I tried to find footage of CBF lecturing and came up with a goose egg. I’m waiting for some to show up after the fact, showing her in her natural state. Some screen grabs of her RateMyProfessor.com evaluationsref 550 provided insight into her unedited and unflattering demeanor. For example:
“Prof. Ford is unprofessional, lacks appropriate filters, and I am honestly scared of her. She’s made comments both in class and in e-mails, if you cross her, you will be on her bad side. I fear to think of the poor clients that had to deal with her while she got her MSW and her LCSW. Absolutely the worst teacher I ever had.”
~RateMyProfessor.com from a furry screen grabref
Supporters cried, “Fake!” OK, but how would we know? The originals got scrubbed from the website (probably with help from the Googleheads.)ref 551 Be my guest: go check.
And when you thought it couldn’t get weirder, her friend of 10 years and boyfriend of 6 years said in a sworn affidavit that CBF never mentioned the assault and flew in planes (including some sketchy ones) many times without fear.ref 552 The new front door installed to alleviate her PTSD just so happened to allow her to illegally rent part of her $3 million house to affluent Google techies, and its timing failed to match her claims.ref 553 The question about helping others with a polygraph is the plot thickener. The boyfriend testified that he witnessed CBF coaching a friend on how to pass a polygraph test.ref 554 Pretty good for somebody who has never taken one. Must have worked, because that friend soon thereafter joined the FBI and stayed until soon after Trump’s win “triggered” her resignation. CBF’s decidedly shifting memories of the assault that had been suppressed until 2012 are curious given that she is a psychologist. By the way, what is her research specialty? Glad you asked: suppressed memories and how one can shape them and even create new ones.ref 555,556
Then it gets super weird. CBF is said to have CIA ties, FWIW.ref 557 Sounds like internet legend, but renowned pundit David Icke seemed to buy it.ref 558 Her parents also have been tied to the CIA.ref 559 Her FBI buddy and handler, Monica McLean,ref 560 worked for Preet Bharara,ref 561 a highly political former prosecutor. One of McLean’s superiors answered to Jim Margolin, who just so happened to be working the Michael Cohen case.ref 562 Another CBF handler during the hearings had also helped Anita Hill take on Clarence Thomas.ref 563 Politics is a very dirty business indeed. CBF’s brother has been tied to Fusion GPS,ref 564 the same clowns who faked the Trump–Russia collusion dossier. My head just exploded, destroying yet another keyboard.
Let’s wrap this up, ACLU claims aside, to make a case against somebody, you need data. Otherwise, it’s just a lynch mob. Just ask Tom Robinson. Some subset of the #MeToo movement doesn't agree with this, but they are wrong. It is a profound problem that sexual assaults often leave no evidentiary trail. I hasten to add that if you read Martha Stout’s The Sociopath Next Door,ref 565 you’ll learn that an estimated 1 in 25 people are said to be clinical sociopaths. Stir in dirty politics, and the odds of flawed testimony soar. You’re welcome to blindly take people at their word, but on issues of such polarizing importance, you would be a fool (or, worse, a virtue signaler). In short, I will not just believe you in the absence of evidence. That’s not how Western justice works.
The final chapter may be unfinished. The democrats took a beating for tactics that seemed evil even among independents.ref 566 Of course, they blamed Avenatti, not themselves.ref 567 After Stephen Colbert asked, “So how did our politics get so poisonous?” one of his staffers, Ariel Dumas, expressed the left’s horror at their failure and solace in their pyrrhic victory:
Oh dear Ariel. You are a hateful person. I hope I haven't offended you. I presume you already know this.
The political establishment has no further use for CBF. It did, however, leave her with a GoFundMe campaign, which kept the spigot cranked open even after everything quieted down, raising over $867,000 to pay off whatever bills and costs were incurred during the ordeal (which is none because the DNC picked up the entire tab).ref 568 I’m sure it helped her remember why she did it.
One could argue that the Kavanaugh story is one of redemption—a potentially precocious teen showing some questionable judgment. Whoopie Goldberg, Malcolm X, Nelson Mandela, and Tim Allen did. I’m willing to let the ambiguity of what Kavanaugh may or may not have done as a teenager be corrected by time as well.
A GoFundMe campaign also left Kavanaugh with >$500,000, which he promptly and certainly mandatorily donated to charity.ref 569 Kavanaugh is now a justice on the Supreme Court of the United States. Those on the left may try to impeach him.ref 570 If they fail, maybe they will take the case all the way to the Supreme Court. Pundits on Fox enjoyed the final victory by, no kidding, downing a couple of beers on air.ref 571 Lindsey Graham seems to have recovered, displaying what may be the smuggest look I have ever seen. That pedophilic eye doctor in need of a beating with a ball-peen hammer is probably dead, but his legend lives on in his nickname: Quick Draw McGraw.
Epilogue: A video of Kavanaugh and his wife celebrating with Trump brought up one last serious question: Does he beat his wife? Oh FFS! Women claiming to work with battered women, however, say they have seen the look a million times. I confess that I watched the damning footageref 572 it quite a few times and, while the narrative is a reach, I could be convinced. This one is gonna live rent-free in my head for awhile.
“Political correctness is elevation of sensitivity over truth.”
~Bill Maher, comedian
The construct of political correctness finds its roots in 1930s communism, in which it was “a semi-humorous reminder that ‘the Party’s interest is to be treated as a reality that ranks above reality itself.’”ref 573 A national survey showed that 80% of American adults think that political correctness is a problem,ref 574 suggesting that a relatively minor 20% are highly educated virtue signalers. Technically, I am a doctor of philosophy, but I identify as a medical doctor and can write you a prescription for a new pair of gonads. Virtue signaling—saying things to impress those around you to show that you are thinking correctly—is said by Taleb to be like paying for indulgences. It is a form of lying that, according to late evolutionary biologist John Maynard Smith, is a way of getting laid. He called it the “sneaky fuckers strategy.”ref 575 But am I not also virtue signaling to the 80% when I pejoratively call the signalers a bunch of wankers? No, because I may be dead wrong but I’m not lying.
A malign interpretation of political correctness—PC for short—is how the politically far left and left-wing power structure exert control over the population. Don’t blame me: I got this little thesis from Malcolm X:ref 576
“If you study the structure of the negro community—economically, politically, civically, psychologically, and otherwise—it’s controlled by the white liberals who usually pose as the friend of the negro who actually differs from the white conservative. . . . I’m suspicious of whites who join negroes and always have to be in the lead. Who always have to be at the top. Who always have to be in negro organizations. Let them give some advice to negroes and stand on the sidelines. . . . [Negro leaders] are puppets who have been put in front of the negro community.”
~Malcolm X, Nation of Islam and civil rights activist
PC encompasses all sorts of oddities, including cultural appropriation and overt disdain for the hat trick of evil—white/heterosexual/male. The blunt but highly effective tool is to hang a repugnant-sounding label on your opponents—misogynist, racist, homophobe, or Canadian—which is guaranteed to send them scrambling for safe spaces (or Jonestown). If the label sticks, you’ve vanquished the bastards.
2018 may have been a turning point. One senses that pushback will not necessarily get you fired. (Keep your savings account topped off, just to be safe.) The Supreme Court ruled that wedding cake bakers do indeed have constitutional protections.ref 577 We saw the emergence of Jordan Peterson, a decidedly no-frills University of Toronto psychologist who cut his teeth opposing mandated PC speech.ref 578 All imaginable labels have been tattooed on Jordan’s ass, but the guy has thought deeply about his beliefs and is a worthy foe. In what became an epic must-see interview—a meme in the making—he eviscerated Cathy Newman.ref 579 Newman was so brutalized by his logic and her inability to brand him by shoving words in his mouth that she embarked on a post-debate victim march and enrolled herself in a concocted witness protection program.ref 580 No, Cathy: Your beating was painful but only metaphorical. The left’s hatred of Jordan helped sell millions of copies of his book that would have sold a few hundred copies to friends and family otherwise (see “Books”). As is so common nowadays—what kind of word is nowadays?— ideas pose a threat. We can’t have any of those! Peterson’s ideas took root so fast that his personal YouTube channel was closed down but then reinstated.ref 581 I watch his interviews like a coach watches game films to see how not to get beat by skullduggery. Cathy would have owned my sorry ass.
Let’s take a peek at the year’s PC Follies in the adult world using a bulleted list—Can I use the word bulleted?—revealing what the “batshit crazies” got into this year. You may find yourself checking the mirror for facial drooping and listening for slurred speech:
- A rapist identified as a trans woman was incarcerated in a women’s prison, where she sexually assaulted four more women.ref 582
- A survey claims that 50% of millennials are socialists and that 75% of those don’t know what it means.ref 583
- The #MeToo movement has spread to corporate America, wherein men supposedly meet to “talk through their feelings, allowing themselves to grow more vulnerable, and, yes, to cry together.”ref 584 I’m tearing up just thinking about it (sob). Despite the fact that this is clearly hyperbolic crockery, some have expressed concerns that these are men’s-only groups.
- A woman hired by Facebook to review content flagged as highly dubious has sued Facebook for being “exposed to highly toxic, unsafe, and injurious content” that caused PTSD.ref 585
- A controversial release of a pedophile on bail got the perp’s decapitated corpse delivered to the judge’s front door.ref 586 That, by the way, is not PC.
- Transgender women continue to do shockingly well in women’s sporting events, including a gold medal at the 2018 UCI Masters Track Cycling World Championships.ref 587 To all you moms and dads who drove your daughter to practices—to the moms in the must-see iconic P&G “Thanks, Mom” Olympic commercialref 588—just remember that everybody is a winner.
- Columbus Day celebrations were canceled in Columbus, Ohio.ref 589
- The pink pussy hat has been deemed offensive to transgender women and gender non-binary people who don’t have typical female genitalia (pussies) and to women of color, whose genitals are not always pink.ref 590
- GOP candidate Ron DeSantis got slammed for telling voters not to “monkey it up” by voting for his gubernatorial opponent in Florida (who happens to be black).ref 591 The left went nuts, saying they have never heard of this phrase or, apparently, this thing we call Google. Obama showed his white-nationalist roots by saying he “monkeyed around” with something.ref 592
- NASCAR’s Conor Daly lost sponsorship of Lilly Diabetes owing to a racially insensitive remark made by his father in the 1980s.ref 593
- Silicon Valley elites are spending $20 per gallon on raw water—water that is fully untreated.ref 594 An old SNL spoof ad sold Swill, mineral water from Lake Erie.ref 595
- The Miss America pageant is removing the bathing suit competition.ref 596 Major news outlets reporting the story invariably showed pictures of prior contestants in skimpy bathing suits. They are replacing this leg of the competition with a quantum mechanics exam and calling it the Cal Tech Admissions Pageant.
- A Canadian restaurant manager booted a customer for wearing a MAGA hat. Customers choked down their bear-meat omelets and left irate.ref 597
- A woman tried to hang her kid in the basement—we’ve all done that one—and struck a bicyclist and a car driven by a pregnant woman while being pursued. The judge gave her probation.ref 598 I must confess that she is statistically unlikely to repeat that again.
- The new celebrity fashion trend is to get facials made from cloned baby foreskins.ref 599 The nickname "Dicknose" seems appropo although something more subtle like Smegyn would work.
- People are squealing for the rights of sex dolls to not be abused.ref 600
- The Brits, never bashful about asking somebody to hold their beers, are discussing whether to make misogyny a hate crime or just let the birds fend for themselves.ref 601 Some note that “everything in the UK has been criminalized except crime.”
- Microsoft is warning customers using Office, Xbox, Skype, and other products that the company is prohibiting offensive language and inappropriate content. Can I use phrases like "totalitarian", "Stalinist", or even "rot in hell fascist pigs?"ref 602
- The mayor of London tweeted that “there is never a reason to carry a knife. Anyone who does will be caught, and they will feel the full force of the law.”ref 603
- A restaurant in Britain charges white customers £13 more than people of colour—it's spelled color, you plonkers—to challenge racial wealth disparity.ref 604 I would guess that the owners personally helped narrow the wealth gap.
- The French had their hold-my-Chablis moment: They are considering a bill to make cat-calling of women a crime punishable with a €750 fine.ref 605
- A Polish brewery, The Order of Yoni, produced a beer marketed as being brewed using vaginal secretions from two smoking-hot models.ref 606 Yoni is Sanskrit for vagina. (I’m not joking . . . and it’s not PC either.)
- Students in Indonesia are making moonshine out of used Tampons.ref 607
- Black Lives Matter and former NAACP kingpin Shaun King was exposed for having some very white parents.ref 608 Rumors of a romance with Rachel Dolezal remain unconfirmed.
- #MeToo activist Asia Argento is said to have paid off a 17-year-old (underage) actor to shut him up about an affair. She now claims her underage love muffin assaulted her.ref 609
- Rhode Island is pondering a one-time $20 fee to access porn sites or other “offensive material” online.ref 610 That really sucks.
- High fashion’s latest trend is said to be male models wearing prosthetics to look pregnant and macho men wearing bras.ref 611 The marketing head at Target says they can’t keep them in stock.
- Literature published by a California health information provider, in an effort to deal with modern gender issues, refers to the vagina as the “front hole.”ref 612 Those who hatched this idea are now called “A-holes.”
- A Roanoke City social services worker was fired and escorted from the building for having a concealed carry permit.ref 613 Not the gun; just the permit.
- Nurses in South Africa have to acknowledge their white privilege before treating aboriginal patients (or get their heads hacked off).ref 614
- The BBC is reducing the salaries of some male journalists after criticism over unequal pay.ref 615 Can’t say I saw that one coming.
- Craigslist shut down personal ads—“SWM looking for hot monkey love”—after Congress passed a bill on sex trafficking.ref 616
- The Manchester Art Gallery took down pre-Raphaelite paintings of naked nymphs to appease the pervs who think other pervs can’t look at them as just art.ref 617
- To fight obesity, the UK wants to legislate that pizzas shrink or lose their fattening toppings.ref 618 Are you guys trying to have a revolution?
- I personally heard a rumor that an employee at one of the FAANGs got reprimanded by human relations for calling a tall colleague a “long drink of water." The correct greeting is, “Hey, Stretch!”
- A judge meted out a 25-year sentence without parole for drunk driving in which nobody got hurt.ref 619 I imagine there was a chronic problem, but you get less for shooting your spouse. Something like house arrest with an ankle bracelet for tracking might have sufficed.
- Team USA was criticized for cultural appropriation for having Native American motifs on their gloves at the Winter Olympics.ref 620 Lacrosse teams around the country are scrambling to figure out how to play without sticks.
- The former head of the CDC grabbed the ass of a friend of 30 years at a party, apologized, and nine months later was arrested and fired.ref 621 The woman said she worried about hurting someone by coming forward . . . and then wrote an article in the New York Times.ref 622 It just so happens that he was up to his ass in the politically charged vaccine debate.
- Swedish authorities pixelated the face in the photo of a man wanted for murder.ref 623
Anything called “The War on . . . " is likely to be a bad idea and ineffectual. The War on Big Gulp Sodas has given way to the War on Straws. Restaurant owners who hand out unsolicited straws in California are subject to $1,000 fines and 6 months in prison for each infraction.ref 624 The originator of the movement, Milo Cress, claimed that 500 million straws are handed out unnecessarily. Milo’s data comes from—wait for it—a phone survey of straw manufacturers he conducted in 2011 when he was just 9 years old.ref 625 The Raw Water lobby was unconcerned because it sells its products in plastic bottles. Some wonder if a plastic straw conviction will keep you from getting a gun permit.
Starbucks is remarkably progressive, but it discovered that the intolerant left eats its own. It got into a spat about whether several black customers were loitering.ref 626 It’s likely that mistakes were made. A corporate-wide policy change to tolerate all such loiterers has now converted Starbucks into a safe space for crackheads.ref 627 The bathroom-dwelling coke-snorters will have to bring their own straws. Starbucks’s new inclusiveness training also warned employees not to “accidentally mistake scruffy-looking husbands for homeless men.” Finally, somebody defends me.
“Dumbass fucking white people marking up the internet with their opinions like dogs pissing on fire hydrants.”
~Sarah Jeong, journalist and New York Times editorial board
Journalist Sarah Jeong was brought onto the editorial board of the New York Times. The newspaper claims to have been fully cognizant of her polarizing tweets over the years. How polarizing? She supported killing cops, killing men, and being remorseful that she will reach the end or her life without having killed a single guy.ref 628,629,630,631,632 The defense that she was fighting trolls by illustrating troll tactics fell apart when the vile tweets just kept surfacing spanning years.ref 633 Vox noted that “a lot of people on the internet today [are] confusing the expressive way antiracists and minorities talk about ‘white people’ with actual race-based hatred, for some unfathomable reason.”ref 634 The Verge, where Jeong still worked, described any assertion of racism in Jeong’s tweets as “dishonest and outrageous.”ref 635 Slate, a publication just slightly left of Putin, came to her defense referring to the work of conservative trolls.ref 636 Of course, she was fired immediately and booted off Twitter. Just kidding. She kept her job and got verified on Twitter because we couldn’t possibly know whether it was her or just some generic hateful, foul-mouthed troll. She hit peak irony when old tweets trolling her current employer surfaced in vast numbers.ref 637
“After a bad day, some people come home and kick the furniture. I get on the Internet and make fun of The New York Times.”
I didn't write about media this year—I had plenty of material but not enough time—but I will say that with Constitution protections offered to journalists come Constitution-level responsibilities. So many of you really suck now. I am talking the bottom-of-the-barrel, "suck the chrome off a trailer hitch" levels of suck.
There is nothing more sanctimonious than Hollywood multi-millionaires shaking their Oscars and talking about oppression. I find it odd that every TV show and movie now includes profound violence and multiple scenes where a lead actor sweeps off the top surface of a desk or kitchen table, plops some starlet’s yoga-tightened ass down, and bangs her lights out. Aren’t they supposed to ask permission—“May I touch your breast?”—or is that rule negated when your paycheck is on the line? Let’s see what Hollywood was up to this year:
- In the moon-landing movie First Man, actor Ryan Gosling refused to plant the American flag.
- The BBC faces backlash for its decision to cast able-bodied Charlie Heaton in its adaptation of The Elephant Man rather any one of dozens of seriously deformed men who decided their best option was to go to USC’s acting program.ref 638
- Hollywood pulled Scarlett Johansson from the role of a transgender man in Rub and Tug because she is not a transgender man.ref 639 That’s why it’s called acting. Daniella Greenbaum defended casting her, but then quit at Business Insider when it pulled her column.ref 640 On the bright side, it was a principled call because they surely didn't boot Scarlett to pump up the box office proceeds.
- Bill Cosby was found guilty of sexual assault. Good riddance.ref 641
- ABC executives regret their “knee-jerk” decision to fire Roseanne Barr because of a few tweets (that I happen to think had no racial intent) after realizing that destroying its best show (and her career) was an expensive blunder.ref 642 Norm MacDonald defended Roseanne for saying the #MeToo movement has gone too far and then was promptly pulled from a Tonight Show appearance.ref 643
- The Weinstein Company filed for bankruptcy, ending all non-disclosure agreements. This could get interesting.ref 644
- Elijah Wood had spoken out boldly about pedophilia in Hollywood saying, “It was all organized. There are a lot of vipers in this industry, people who only have their own interests in mind. There is darkness in the underbelly . . . victims can’t speak as loudly as the people in power. That’s the tragedy of attempting to reveal what is happening to innocent people: They can be squashed.”ref 645 Elijah now declares no direct knowledge of pedophilia in Hollywood.ref 646 The pervs got to him.
- Having attained predator status as an alleged pedophile, Kevin Spacey got written out of the script of House of Cards.ref 647 His new movie, somewhat ironically named Billionaire Boys Club, which was already in the can, opened in eight theaters and made $287.ref 648 That is not a typo. It would have been less if the one guy who went and sat in the back pleasuring himself—let's call him just "Kevin"—also bought a large Coke and popcorn. (How do you know when it is bedtime in the Spacey house? When the big hand touches the little hand.)
- The Academy Awards hit an all-time low Nielsen rating—a 24% drop year over year—because sanctimony doesn’t sell.ref 649 Remember the olden days when they would defend victims like Juanita Broaddrick? Me neither.
- The new Jack Ryan series was “blasted” for pushing “masculine American heroism” and “white male entitlement.”ref 650
- My wife dragged me off to see Mama Mia (the sequel). The four men in the theater that night were literally congratulating each other for falling on their swords. By movie's end, I wondered if Hollywood may start delivering us leading men—three in this case—lacking any semblance of masculinity.
PC loses its humorous component when it goes violent. Antifa seems to have taken over Portland, Oregon. I never expected to read about “The Battle of Portland.”ref 651 This liberal enclave seems to be unprotected by the police, who were told to stand down.ref 652 Antifa has now been declared “domestic terrorists” by the authorities.ref 653 Portland citizens cheered as a squad of police scrubbed the streets of Antifa rascals harassing passersby.ref 654 Antifa vandalized the Metropolitan Republican Club in New York City and sees no irony in talk about punching Nazis.ref 655 A professor of philosophy who cold-cocked an unsuspecting person is out on $200,000 bail.ref 656 Apparently, if you are a prominent republican, you are no longer eligible to dine in public because the intolerant left has the right to make you miserable. A rare unmasked Antifa thug screamed vile insults to the widow of a 9/11 victim (a fireman).ref 657 The assailant escaped harm by a razor-thin margin. The Unmasking Antifa Act of 2018 proposes laws prohibiting protesting with a mask.ref 658 I’m fence-sitting that one. An investigative journalist undercover probing Antifa appears to have been whacked shortly after he vowed to expose George Soros.ref 659
A friend of the family supported this no-rules approach to politics, prompting me to “lose my shit” and state, “You are declaring war. Do you realize that my team has all the fucking guns?” This prompted my wife to send me to the store on an errand.
There is a really ugly side to the gender battles that I had underestimated until now. Let’s open with a tweet that sat in my notes for months:
“Well, I don’t want to go up and talk to her, because I’m going to be called a rapist or something.”
~Henry Cavill, actor who plays Superman in the DC universe films
Mike Pence, darling of the left (not), noted his policy to never have dinner alone with a woman who is not his wife.ref 660 This got called the Pence Rule and led to some investigative journalism. What they discovered is that corporate America, in addition to all the misogynist white men, is heavily populated with men fearing that they will be accused of something without cause.ref 661 Some said that they won’t ride alone in an elevator with a female colleague. Others have age cutoffs, below which the women are avoided. This is truly horrifying—what economists might call a negative externality of higher order. Young women need access to mentoring and opportunity. Fear of association—call it a phobia if you wish—is profoundly destructive. One gent said that the solution is obvious: “Just don't be an asshole.”ref 662 He is trivializing this paradox (and virtue signaling). We are moving women and minorities into positions of power and authority. Society hasn’t completely worked out some of the details.
“The wind of freedom blows.”
~Stanford University’s motto
“You can’t spend your whole life worrying about your mistakes. You fucked up! You trusted us.”
~Otter in Animal House
Many administrators, professors, and students are working their asses off to get it right, going about the business of scholarship and education. Parents hand us their kids and ask us to equip them with technical and social skills needed to become functional adults. They also ask us to keep them healthy and safe for their first road trip. Most exceed our expectations outside the control of their parents (at least before cell phones). Forget not that these students descended from mammoth hunters. The headlines you read and YouTube clips you see of faculty and students acting like assholes belie the thousands of success stories that would make you proud and that Make America Great. (OK. Maybe I’m pressing my luck now.) There is, however, a creeping Tyranny of the Few—noisy whack jobs—who can alter the tenor of campus life. When they start throwing their feces, all hell breaks loose. I would call it Tyranny of the Minority, but that might be misconstrued as some racist dig, and I would find myself in front of a tribunal or angry mob (which I file in the Department of Redundancy Department).
“The darkest part is not the rise of radicalism, but the passive acquiescence of the vast majority of faculty and students.”
~Lee Jussim, professor of psychology at Rutgers University
“When they come to you—your kids—and say, ‘I’d like to study critical race theory and intersectionality and bullshit 101 whiteness.’ Then you say, ‘Yeah, well, you are going to pay the $60,000 because I am not going to pay the money that I have amassed through my hard work for you to be polluted learning about nihilistic academic fields that are intellectual terrorism.”
~Gad Saad, professor at Concordia University
Universities suffer from a host of self-inflicted wounds. Surveys show that what was a 2:1 left-wing lean among some faculty now tips the scales at anywere from 10:1 to well over 50:1.ref 663 Some colleges are said to have no conservatives. (I suspect they are in closets.) The rallying cry is that faculty members are all left leaning because of their great intellects. There is a core group of academics (students and faculty) that seems to have an insatiable need to gripe about wide-ranging topics that have been codified as “grievance studies.”ref 664 If your kid’s major ends in the word “Studies,” you might want to peek at the curriculum. Actions that are so insignificant as to be called “microaggressions”—mathematically one-millionth of a normal aggression—are now campus horrors to be strangled in the crib. In a grand bargain to create the most inclusive communities, universities are dismantling freedom of association of like-minded students.ref 665 Removal of such self-assembled support groups—think fraternities, for example—is forcing students to suffer an odd crowded isolation. If you oppose this new order, be ready to be tagged with a pejorative label that ends in “–phobia,” “–archy,” or “–ist.” Society is also trying to remove all semblances of hierarchies as being unfair or not inclusive, ignoring the fact that they are biological and cultural evolution's mechanism to minimize conflicts.
“My daughter is looking for a summer job. She’s a millennial so she’s hoping to find part-time work as a CEO."
~Brian Kiley (@kileynoodles)
We as a nation measure our intellectual worth by numbers of college graduates. Of course, students and their parents are loading up on mountains of debt to spend four or more years to “find themselves.” The military or Peace Corps will do so more cost-effectively, and for a mere $150,000, I will personally find your kid and save you a lot of money. The proliferation of college experiences that leave students with little or no chance of discharging their debt after graduation has done irreparable damage to a generation. This is not hyperbole: irreparable damage. I suspect that replacing half of our college degrees with technical training would provide huge benefits. An elevator repair guy told me that after a five-year paid apprenticeship, he will make a six-digit salary. What does four or five income-free, debt-laden years in college guarantee you?
“Whereas the University of Chicago has traditionally sought to cultivate an intellectually robust and diverse student body by seeking out creative and unconventional thinkers, the introduction of a pre-professional business major would attract applicants who view their education primarily as a preparation for lucrative careers.”
~An activist’s letter, nailing it!
The Department of Education claims that administrative positions have grown at 10 times the rate of tenured faculty positions.ref 666 The University of Michigan currently employs a staff of 93 full-time diversity administrators.ref 667 More than 25% earn in excess of $100,000—as much as elevator repair techs. These soaring added costs are exacerbated by an arms race to provide better food, dorms, study and safe spaces, and gym facilities. Schools either upgrade or watch the talent head off to greener pastures. Jonathan Haidt and Greg Lukianoff (see "Books") say that colleges crossed the Rubicon when they began thinking of students as consumers, and we all know the consumer as King. The unwillingness of college administrators to stand up to precocious and, at times unruly, consumers has been called an “epidemic of cowardice.”
“Universities are becoming ungovernable.”
~Anonymous university president
Now let us wander through anecdotal disasters that occasionally visit college campuses—stories that should touch a wide range of emotions, including the fear somebody slipped you a roofie. Colleges and universities constitute the mothership of political correctness. Let’s begin with just some seriously goofy shit. Bear in mind that some of these ideas get attributed to universities when they are more likely emanating from university-sanctioned organizations—student clubs—that are given the coveted right to free speech, which they promptly exploit to suppress free speech from others:
Standardized tests are being removed so that objective measures of skill and merit can be replaced with more subjective measures of things like, oh, ideological conformity.
- A Michigan State University study concluded that Latinos who support meritocracy, hard work, and independence are perpetuating a bias problem.ref 668
- A Clayton State University professor offered students extra credit to attend an event of the Democratic Party's gubernatorial candidate: The school intervened.ref 669
- Gonzaga University hosted an “International Day of Tolerance,” urging students, particularly “white people,” to ask themselves, “Am I a tolerant person?” and “Do I stereotype people?”ref 670 There is a concept rich in irony.
- The University of Colorado-Boulder has removed the term “illegal aliens” from its library catalog in favor of “more ethical subject headings” to foster an “inclusive atmosphere.”ref 671 I have thoughts on what else you could remove from where.
- University of Texas treats masculinity as a “mental health issue,” empowering young men to “break the cycle.”ref 672 I'm guessing the Alamo is no longer in the curriculum.
- Clapping has been banned at the University of Manchester student union to avoid triggering anxiety and improve accessibility. It has been replaced with “jazz hands.”ref 673
- A Fresno State professor followed a series of dubious tweets—we've all done that— with one baiting people to call her. The phone number she posted was for a mental health hotline instead.ref 674 Bet that worked well for this high-function moron.
- Students at law schools are being triggered by curricula covering entire branches of study. Lectures on rape law, for example, are popular targets.ref 675 These same activists are likely to speak out in support of rape victims, albeit in total ignorance.
- Emotional support dogs are growing by leaps and bounds.ref 676 That’s cool; I have three Labrador retrievers, although I would not call them supportive.
- George Washington University students launched a petition to change the school’s mascot from the Colonials to the Hippos because Colonials is too evocative of colonization and oppression.ref 677 Hippos are really fat: aren't you fat shaming and culturally appropriating hippos?
- Princeton put on (packed on?) a “fat-positive dinner” to discuss “fat-positive programming for the spring semester.”ref 678 The university also offered a course to help students fight “fat phobia” through dance. I'm more than a few pounds heavy now, and my wife fat-shames the heck out of me.
- “If someone calls you fuckin’ fat, they may be bullying you, but you might be fuckin’ fat.”
- ~David Goggins, former Navy Seal
- I did the math: The famous “Freshman 15”—the pounds gained from all-you-can-eat buffet-style dining—causes Cornell’s North Campus housing to gain 45,000 lbs. every fall semester. I wonder if building codes accounted for this.
- Students at Lee University petitioned to disinvite Vice President Mike Pence, declaring that Pence’s political views are “at odds with Christian values.”ref 679 What would Jesus say?
- A professor who teaches politics and global security at Virginia Tech tells us that fossil fuels are contributing to a warped sense of “masculine identity” and “authoritarianism” among men, coining the phrase “petro-masculinity” to describe what she sees as a convergence of “climate change, a threatened fossil fuel system, and an increasingly fragile Western hypermasculinity.”ref 680 Nailed it.
- A group of UCLA students earning $13 an hour to promote diversity on campus started a “Toxic Masculinity Committee.”ref 681 I'm guessing that they don’t lift weights together.
- A St. Mary’s College professor offered a term project instead of a real final exam on topics ranging from “environmental racism,” “the Green Movement in Africa,” and “eco-normativity in Western environmental campaigns.”ref 682
- Mount Holyoke College, an all-women’s school, is discouraging calling female students “women” to promote a “gender neutral” classroom environment.ref 683
- A Cornell student gave her senior thesis defense in her underwearref 684 because her professor—a progressive and widely respected female faculty member—suggested that what she was wearing in her practice talk was potentially inappropriate.ref 685 Yeah, well, I was Cornell’s first streaker, running through Bio 101 in the fall of 1972.
“I tell 18-year-olds, ‘Six years ago you were 12; what the hell do you know?’”
~Jordan Peterson, Professor of Psychology and author of 12 Rules for Life
- A University of Wisconsin student filed a dreaded “bias report” after a peer hogged weights at the campus gym then yelled at him to back off.ref 686
- A website entitled, “Make them scared UW,” run by University of Washington students, allows individuals to anonymously accuse people of sexual assault with no evidence.ref 687
- A Marquette University student group is telling “white folks” to “stop calling the cops” when they feel threatened. “Hey, what do ya say you put down your dukes and give me a big hug?”ref 688
- A math paper was withdrawn in an uproar because it tried to model the genetics of gender differences.ref 689 (There’s an “irrational number” joke in there somewhere.)
- A paper suggesting that males have fat-tailed intelligence bell curves—they tend to occupy the extremes of the spectrum—created such a ruckus that the National Science Foundation wanted acknowledgement of support removed. The paper got retracted.ref 690
- A professor at Wilfred Laurier University wrote a book with a chapter entitled, “When a Man’s Home is Not a Castle: Hegemonic Masculinity Among Men Experiencing Homelessness". The detailed description does not clarify the idiocy.ref 691
- A professor who was charged and pleaded guilty to a work-unrelated domestic violence charge years earlier was written up in the school newspaper. A shitstorm ensued, and he killed himself.ref 692 Y’all have blood on your hands and maybe lucky he turned the gun on himself. There are good articles on “academic mobbing” and other neo-Stalinist behaviors.ref 693
- A paper on gender dysphoria by a Brown University assistant professor drew so much attention that Brown distanced itself from the work. A dean at Harvard hammered the president of Brown for being a coward (my words).ref 694
- The University of Minnesota is considering introducing a “Pronoun Rule.” Professors, staff, and students who use the wrong pronouns (he, she, ze) risk firing or expulsion.ref 695 Zat is nuts.
- Food workers at NYU’s dining facility celebrated Black History Month with “racially insensitive” meals.ref 696 The employees are African-American. Seems like it ought to provide some cover. The real crime was that the girl—can I call a teenager a girl?—said she—can I say she?—was “ignored.” A woman scorned…
“[T]his modern-day trend of cultural appropriation of yoga is a continuation of white supremacy and colonialism, maintaining the pattern of white people consuming the stuff of culture that is convenient and portable, while ignoring the well-being and liberation of Indian people.”
~Shreena Gandhi, a religious studies professor at Michigan State
“Nothing could be more asinine than outrage against ‘cultural appropriation’.”
~Steven Pinker, professor at Harvard University
- A psychology study by researchers at San Francisco State University claims that 25% of millennials have PTSD because of the 2016 elections.ref 697 Heterodox Academy says it is the Gen-Zers, not the millennials, that began disrupting campuses abruptly in 2014-ish.ref 698
- Hofstra students want to remove a Thomas Jefferson statue (because he was such a douche).ref 699
- The removal of a Civil War statue at North Carolina State by protestors took hours, but campus police did nothing. Turns out the protestors were outside agitators, not students.ref 700
- Students at Baylor University will receive training in microaggressions.ref 701 This training includes “talking to the victim” and “educating the attacker.” Recall that complimenting a woman on her shoes is considered a microaggression, so maybe the term "attacker" and "victim" is just a wee bit hyperbolic.
- Feminists at Yale University are lobbying the administration to force all-male fraternities to open recruitment to women while not pushing to integrate sororities.ref 702
- University of Wisconsin-Stevens Point will be cutting programs to "recognize a growing preference among students for majors with clear career pathways".ref 703 Tenured faculty in Art, English, Geography, History, Philosophy, Political Science, and Sociology will be packing their bags. I'm speechless.
“I cultivate a cutting-edge approach to human geography through a theoretical edifice that foregrounds emerging thematic concerns within the discipline by incorporating both poststructuralist critique and a radical revival of anarchist philosophy.”
~Simon Springer, professor and anarchist-geographer at the University of Victoria
Hyper-active political correctness is not unique to the United States. Lecturers in Britain have been told “not to use words in capital letters in course assignments because it might ‘frighten students’.”ref 704 BOO! Made ya flinch. A journalism school’s staff have been told to mollycoddle students by “writing in helpful, warm tones, avoiding officious language and negative instructions."ref 705 The memo refers to “enhancing student understanding, engagement, and achievement” and listed frowned-upon words. A Dutch university mob protested the appearance of Jordan Peterson because of “his politically-incorrect worldview.”ref 706
Three academics totally punked the grievance studies community by writing a bunch of fake papers—getting a few published and another pile accepted—before they pulled back the curtain.ref 707 My favorite podcaster, Joe Rogan, interviewed two of the perpetrators, Peter Boghossian and James Lindsay (Helen Wilson was not present).ref 708 This is 2 hours of eye-watering hysteria. They describe fake papers about gendering dogs at dog parks and putting men on leashes. They used the search-and-replace command on Hitler’s Mein Kampf to replace “Jew” with “white male” and then wrote a paper using the new sentences. A paper titled, "Going in Through the Back Door" described the desensitization of heterosexual men to homophobia by inserting various objects into their butts. The referees’ suggestions, without fail, made the papers even nuttier. They learned to “problematize” the target thesis and use “word laundering” to take a normal word and give it special meaning. (If you like binge-watching stuff, try Joe Rogan's 1200 podcasts.)
“There is no such thing as black racism.”
~A professor at Florida Gulf Coast University
Psst. Professor. Come here. Closer…YOU'RE AN IDIOT! Goofy ideas begin to do damage by leaking into the curriculum. As told by one of my favorites, Campus Reform, Berkeley offers courses about white privilege to “confront uncomfortable conversations about privilege and positionality” and to “understand where white bodies have the responsibility to be in movements against white supremacy and in solidarity with marginalized peoples and groups of color."ref 709 Berkeley offers over 150 student-taught courses, which helps keep the lights on and is said to be “an excellent way of meeting the University’s minimum unit requirement." One can only imagine the course content. A course at Salisbury University in Maryland titled, “Pyramid of White Supremacy” teaches students about—I don’t know—maybe pyramids of white supremacy?ref 710
Those little twinges of bias can get rather specific. A gender studies professor at Northwestern University suggests we should be able to “hate men.”ref 711 I can sign off on a few. If you surmise that the professor is referring to women, you might be wrong. Self-loathing and virtue signaling is considered admirable among young men. A University of Maryland support group called “White Awake” was designed to help white students who may “sometimes feel uncomfortable and confused before, during, or after interactions with racial and ethnic minorities.”ref 712 Pressure caused the University to change the name to “Anti-Racism and Ally Building Group.” How about just “Race Baiting 101”?
One of the big stories is that Harvard is getting pounded in court for racism in its admissions.ref 713 When a school bends over backward to accept underrepresented kids, it necessarily excludes others. Society decided long ago that, in moderation, this is an acceptable price to pay. Apparently, those of Asian descent—what we call Asian Americans—are taking the brunt of it, and numbers showing the bias are compellingref 714 and drawing fire from the courts.ref 715 I once personally stepped on a rake by claiming just such a latent bias exists. I can't even fake the PC thingie I guess. Evidently, kids with Asian-sounding names were scoring rather poorly in the subjective categories involving personality. I think universities have the right to accept only Americans if they want, whether such a policy is advisable is an altogether different story. They do not, however, have the right to discriminate against those named Chang, Chen, Lee, or Park.
“The greatest threat to free speech is no longer governmental.”
~Bret Weinstein, former professor at Evergreen State College
“This is beyond free speech; this is disrespectful.”
~President of Fresno State University
Probably the largest and most consequential political shift is the move away from free speech. One survey showed that 50% of students would support a law making it illegal to say offensive things in public.ref 716 Another revealed that only 35% of female college students think free speech is more important than “diversity and inclusion.”ref 717 A Gallup poll showed that the majority of American college students support “disinviting” speakers they don’t like; 37% support shouting them down; and 10% support using violence to silence them.ref 718 Anti-abortion clubs have been banned because the ideas being discussed are considered subversive.
“Identity” politics—the decidedly left-wing idea that you subsume your identity to that of the group and, thus, necessarily forfeit independent thought—arrived on campuses with little warning around 2013–14. Scholars like Haidt and Lukianoff have burned a lot of ATP trying to understand from whence it came and why. I have a theory! Kids are influenced profoundly during their formative years—their Wonder Years. What book series totally dominated the childhoods of current college kids? That’s right: Harry Potter. Early in the first book, the little wand-wielding wizards are assigned a group for the rest of their stay at Hogwarts by a magic hat. Once assigned, they assume the behavioral norms of their group. May God have mercy on your soul if you become a Slytherin. This is the stuff of Harvard psychology PhD theses showing how quickly people form group identities. It’s the classic prisoner–guard experiment.ref 719 It’s what inspires normally sane people to sit in –20°F weather in Green Bay wearing a cheese hat while rooting for a team full of guys with whom they have absolutely no shared ideals or experiences. We are witnessing the Slytherins coming of age and arriving on campuses.
“Apparently, all that is required to throw a student out of school is that some other student claims to feel unsafe."
~Gregory Germain, professor of law
The Title IX program that began with normalizing college commitments to women’s sports has morphed into a commitment to women’s rights more generally. It’s a great idea on paper. In the hands of activist university administrators, however, it can be nightmarish.ref 720 On the heels of a tenure case at Cornell in which an unsubstantiated assertion arguably cost an assistant professor tenure according to the courts,ref 721 the young accuser—Jane Doe, of course—subsequently exacted retribution on one of the faculty member’s graduate students, slamming the brakes on his PhD defense by filing yet another Title IX complaint.ref 722 Two dozen Cornell law professors interceded, demanding that Cornell grant the student his PhD and stop the bullshit (my words, not theirs).ref 723 As I've said before, if you ever run into John Doe or Jane Roe, for heavens sake stay away. Nothing good can happen.
A decidedly progressive sociology professor at University of Michigan, after accusing a student of plagiarism, was accused of harassment.ref 724 In a world where accusations are so vague and difficult to sort fact from fiction, Oberlin has a 100% conviction rate.ref 725 That is what they used to call "a hangin' judge". The courts are routinely beating up universities and exacting large fines when due process drops below minimally acceptable levels. Courts are demanding universities up their games on due process, which is sorely lacking on some campuses. This long-overdue pushback against unchecked Title IX cases has the most militant supporters of the #MeToo movement angry. After years of sexual harassment and abuse at the hands of men, they feel that women’s evidence-free accusations should suffice. Nearly 100 students at the University of Southern California demanded a tenured professor be fired after he sent a reply-all email noting that “accusers sometimes lie.”ref 726 Others hold the quaint view that trying to destroy somebody’s life is a problem regardless of the weapon of choice. Cases of demonstrably false accusations keep piling up in numbers not approaching legitimate accusations but sufficient to underscore the importance of due process.ref 727 Here is my bottom line: If you have no data you have no case, regardless of how heinous the crime. I repeat: It’s how our system works.
“Racism is a serious issue, and unfortunately what we found were many examples of students willing to use that charge in an attempt to get back at their peers in everyday squabbles.”
~Chris Rochester, director of communications at MacIver Institute
I chose not to describe dozens of grisly stories, including many false accusations, and instead finish by noting that progress toward normalcy is detectable. We are starting to have discussions about identity politics. The now legendary Evergreen State College appears to be going even further down the rabbit hole toward totalitarianism and headed for insolvency.ref 728 That’s probably a win. Nationally recognized progressives including Alan Dershowitz, Steven Pinker, John McWhorter, Bret Weinstein, Heather Heyling, and Jordan Peterson—collectively referred to as the “Intellectual Dark Web”ref 729—are now defending against leftist McCarthyism on college campuses. Betsy DeVos, secretary of education, is attempting to tighten up some of the details of Title IX (much to the horror of fuming progressives).ref 730 Nicholas Christakis, one of the controversial Yale professors who found himself in the middle of Social Justice Warfare by supporting the idea that Yale students are capable of choosing their own Halloween costumes, has been awarded one of Yale’s Sterling Professorships, the highest honor a faculty member can receive.ref 731 Right-wing activist group TPUSA has watchlists of left-wing professors. That would look like a telephone book and is very bad idea for a bunch of free-speech libertarian types.ref 732 Princeton University has become the second Ivy League school, after Yale, to face a federal Title IX investigation into allegations that some of its programs discriminate against male students.ref 733 This too shall pass.
“We’ve been paid to leave a burning building.”
~Heather Heyling, commenting on her and her husband Bret Weinstein’s severance packages to leave Evergreen State College
“Prepare the child for the road, not the road for the child.”
~Jonathan Haidt, author of Coddling the American Mind
No generation is completely ready for the next one. Certainly the Greatest Generation was ill-prepared for the arrival of drug-addled boomers who trusted nobody over 30. The latest generation of young punks has discovered porn on their phones, rendering back issues of National Geographic obsolete. Cyberbullying is acute, especially for girls who seem to be more at risk and are more prone to destroying social structures without having to resort to formal violence according to Haidt and Lukianoff (see "Books").ref 734 (When you Google this you will get articles about the girls as victims without clear statements about girls as perpetrators.) The boys, taking cues from the Jackass series, impale themselves from skateboards, dive into bonfires, and eat Tide Pods (killing more than one of these Tide Podlers).ref 735 Procter & Gamble is making its Tide Pods even less appetizing, if you can imagine that.ref 736 The sport of snorting a condom and pulling it out of your mouth probably has a funny back story.ref 737 Efforts to test boundaries are now “hold my phone” moments. Although Darwin Awardees in Training are not new, one wonders how many fatalities uploaded to the cloud are caused by the iPhone.
What has changed, however, is what the boomers will do to protect the little dumplings, inadvertently doing more damage in the process. These protective measures range from sketchy to moronic. (Sorry: If the shoe fits wear it, pinhead.) Parents are now monitoring their kids’ calls, email, and phone messages. Phone apps now exist that make the kid check in, or the cops get called and the phone tracked.ref 738 “We found your kid, Mr. and Mrs. Stalin. Their battery had died. Would you like us to take them to the Gulag anyway?" What happened to “be home for dinner by six and don’t be late?” An Edmonton day care is requiring kids bring helmets to protect them on the playground.ref 739 Sugared drinks are being mandated by law to be removed from children’s meal menus at restaurants.ref 740 Several towns have made it unlawful for a 12-year-old to trick or treat,ref 741 presumably to protect the littler kids who are, without fail, now accompanied by dozens of adults. A fine of $25 or “up to 6 months in jail” seems a bit weird. "I’ll take the $25, your Honor." We check the kids’ candy to make sure there are no razor blades or poison, unaware that every documented case of such attempted infanticide has been traced to a family member. “Honey, I poisoned the kids.” In one county, 10- and 11-year-olds must have at least one parent “get to the choppers” (helicopter parent) when the kids are outside playing.ref 742 Disney’s Sleeping Beauty is finally drawing scorn for the scene in which Prince Charming ravages the sleeping girl with a non-consensual kiss.ref 743 Hey, Amnesty International: Don't you have bigger fish to fry?
Of course, once the kids hit high school, it’s time to give some slack to the leash. Yeah, right. One high school declared that oral presentations in class are an unreasonable burden for those with anxiety.ref 744 Jonathan Haidt notes that we have about 100 kidnappings per year—most by a pissed-off divorcee parent—while 10 kids per day are killed texting and driving. One Girl Scout got the clever idea of selling her cookies in front of a pot dispensary.ref 745 I suspect a boomer parent hatched that plan. She sold 312 boxes to the stoners. Girl Scouts of America declared it “not cool.”ref 746 The GSA administrators in the Colorado chapter, however, declared that it was "totally cool, Dudette."ref 747 One teacher decided that the term “Ma’am” was inappropriate in the current PC culture. When the kid just couldn’t shake this rural nicety, she made him write the word repeatedly (which seems kinda backward) and have his parents sign it.ref 748 The teacher also said that if she had had something, she “would have thrown it at him.” I can only imagine that parent–teacher conference. Schools are banning children from using the term best friend over fears that some really unlikeable, spoiled little douche may feel left out. This also ensures that kids will not form tight, lasting relationships. A teacher in Florida was fired for refusing to give students a grade of 50% even though the assignments were not turned in.ref 749 The school had an unstated “no zero” policy. Ironically, the school was run by a bunch of zeroes.
Most of these are marginally harmful lobotomizations that may not leave scars (provided the kid doesn’t become a cutter). However, many child psychologists suggest that increasing academic problems in young boys stem from repeated chastisement for acting like, well, young boys. Schools are denouncing toxic masculinity in kindergarten.ref 750 Kids caught “sexting”—sending semi-lewd or lewd pictures via cellphone—are being charged with trafficking in child porn.ref 751 One elementary school passed around flyers denouncing “white privilege.”
The institutionalization of PC not only hurts the kids but also infringes on parents’ rights to add any post-genetic finishing touches and determine levels of risk. A mom was investigated for letting her 8-year-old walk the dog around the block. Another received a visit from the police because her kids were playing in the front yard “unsupervised.” She noted that, "For something like this to happen to me, there’s something really wrong." Ya think? Something like this once happened to my wife and I, and a woman from social services showed up. Once this sanctimonious piece of human detritus—Do I sound like I’m over it?—started citing the scriptures in a decidedly sanctimonious way, I told her that "I am fighting the urge to throw you out the door on your fucking head." My wife suggested my comments were counterproductive. I thought I showed great restraint.
Schools are throwing Common Core math at them, ensuring that they will all share a common denominator: total mathematical ignorance including not knowing what “common denominator” means. After dropping $400 million on its development, the Gates Foundation declared common core math a total failure.ref 752 It is still in use, lobotomizing children across the country. I suspect its deep-seated purpose was to forcibly engineer equal outcome at any cost. So much for inclusivity. Ian McEwan, an award-winning author, began to wonder about the system as a whole when after helping his son with an essay about his own novel his son received a C.ref 753
“If you breastfeed your sons, you are training them to be rapists when they grow up. You’re basically teaching them that they can touch a woman’s body whenever they want. If you oppose rape, stop breastfeeding boys!”
~Shaykha Alia (@AliaAbheed), activist, not joking
Schools are increasingly filled with boys, girls, and fence sitters. I must confess that sexual and gender ambiguities must be traumatic for kids who are already in traumatic periods of their lives. I watched my son for at least 5 years wondering if and when he would come out (even to his family). He waited till it was time. Nobody else gets to make that call. Let the parents ponder how to raise the kid in the most nurturing and constructive manner possible.
I even support parents who are serious loons doing stuff I think is sketchy because it’s not my kid. A new class of child called “theybies” are babies and kids raised gender neutrally, ensuring that they will consume copious quantities of mental health services later in life.ref 754 One woman fought gender norms by naming her son Vagina.ref 755 Middle school may get a little rough. Didn’t Johnny Cash write a song titled, "A Boy Named Vagina"? There are, however, some real consequences moving down to the younger age brackets. Pediatricians and psychologists are battling it out over gender dysphoria, what it means, and what to do about it. Scientists are using fMRI to study transgenderismref 756 (sounds good) to aid earlier "transition" (gettin’ a little sketchy), possibly as early as age 3.ref 757 Hold your horses there, Buckeroos: You might want to wait till they can talk and get through a whole day without Pull-Ups (gender-neutral colors, of course.) Some worry about “social and peer contagion” of the gender dysphoria;ref 758 this is not like some passing lesbian phase sophomore year in college. One judge removed a 17-year-old transgender teen from her parents because they refused to allow hormone treatments.ref 759 All of this reminds me of the Saturday Night Live skit with the doctor who delivered 4,000 girls in a row. Half needed only a minor postnatal surgical procedure. One thing is clear, if your son transitions to become a girl, get ready to pay more for toys and clothes.ref 760 Somehow the free market has figured out that there is a recessive X-linked gene for insensitivity to price. If, on the contrary, your daughter transitions to a boy, you will be able to afford college. Jazz hands!
When I was a kid we had one rule: Be home for dinner. I was riding my bike miles from home by age 8 and groping young girls (not like Brett Kavanaugh!) and hitchhiking with permission at 12, drinking without permission at 13, smoking pot at 14, and dropping acid at 15. I started to study at 17, graduated from Cornell with a degree in genetics at 22, and got my PhD in chemistry at 25. (Yes folks: That is a 2.7-year PhD from Columbia and no post-doc, all with damaged chromosomes to boot.) Nobody broke my spirit by declaring me flawed. My peer group played copious quantities of only self-supervised sandlot sports until middle school. We laid out the field, made up the rules, refereed the games, and had some Lord-of-the-Flies moments. This peer group generated a three-time first-team All-American lacrosse player at Syracuse, the 12-year center for the Dallas Cowboys, and probably the only faculty member in the modern era to have been an assistant or head coach of two collegiate sports (me).
How about some solutions or suggestions, Dave? OK. Since you asked. First, read Jonathan Haidt’s and Greg Lukianoff's book, Coddling the American Mind (see “Books”). I sent it to one of Cornell’s deans, and he said it described the problems landing in his office to the letter. Let them go outside, get hurt, cause trouble, and pay some consequences. No broken bones or lost eyes? That was a good day. Stop depriving kids of constructive play by inserting vast numbers of résumé-boosting activities with oppressive levels of adult supervision. I’ve read college and graduate admissions applications for many years; most parents haven’t a clue about what really matters. Watch the movie Stand by Me or the often overlooked Tree of Life. That was my childhood. And don’t you dare say those were simpler times; that’s a load of garbage asserted by helicopter parents.
Others are also taking action. The French are talking about banning phones in school. At first I flinched, but I realized that they’re onto something.ref 761 A woman named Lenore Skenazy has started the free-range parenting movement, which supports the type of parenting that used to be considered normal.ref 762 I am also now an enthusiastic supporter of school choice. If you insist on indoctrinating kids, at least give the parents the choice of which gulag to ship them off to every morning. And on the more micro level, give families some choice: (a) common core math versus actual math; (b) learning how to write versus reading books like Waiting for Godot, and (c) secular or religious philosophical underpinning. Parents shouldn’t have to pay double for private schools at least in the more populated areas where multiple tracks and schools are already necessary; there would be no added cost. Finally, let the kids determine their peer groups—let’s call them “boys” and “girls”—and let them play separately without adults force-feeding inclusion. Are what we called “cooties” now microaggressions with “attackers” and “victims”? There will be plenty of time in the later years for coed binge drinking and teen pregnancies. If none of this makes sense, that’s OK, but may God have mercy on your soul, mofo.
Bad times create strong men.
Strong men create good times.
Good times create weak men.
Weak men create bad times.
It’s safe to say we have tough times ahead, because that has always been true. If equity markets regress to the mean while the 38-year-old bond bull market turns into a bear, we will witness some serious wealth destruction. I could be wrong, of course, but if the case for overvaluation in both equities and fixed incomes is sound, I remind you that gravity always wins. It is undefeated. China seems on the cusp of the first serious lesson about the downside of capitalism. The European Experiment of a super-sovereign world may falter when fill-in-the-blanxits start leaving. If the U.S. finally comes to terms with its debt problem through a mechanism I haven’t yet imagined, the 12-step program will not include excessive consumption on the back of more debt (hair of the dog). Boom–bust cycles are normal, but this one could be a bit too synchronous for comfort, and it follows a supernatural monetary policy.
“There is a numbness out there, there is an ambivalence out there that’s concerning. . . . When the next turn comes—and it will come—it’s likely to be more violent than it would otherwise be if we let some pressure off along the way.”
~Michael Corbat, Citigroup CEO
Here’s what is bugging me. There has been a growing malaise since the ’08–’09 crisis manifesting upheavals that seem correlated. I blame Obama and his Department of Justice in part. This is not because of his politics—they shockingly never bugged me that much, and I like the guy—but rather because he let the bad guys go by policy. They stitched up festering wounds that laid foundations for social upheaval (mixed metaphorically speaking). The Occupy Wall Street movement was toothless but a beta test. Now we have Antifa, which is a combination of dangerous people and gullible followers. Presumably there are right-wing analogs, but I find them harder to identify as coherent groups.
“Liberals claim to want to give a hearing to other points of view, and are then shocked and offended when they discover there are other points of view.”
~William F. Buckley, founder of The National Review
I think the reason that those on the left are so prominent on my radar right now is that they went berserk when Hillary—the first female presidential contender—got beaten by the most repugnant opponent they could imagine. You don’t have to look hard to see educated and intelligent people—they are not one and the same—saying some of the most vile things. From the left has spawned an intolerant liberal left. There seems to be a prevailing wisdom that if you know you have the moral high ground (who doesn’t think that?), there are no rules. You first label your opponent—white, male, conservative, heterosexual, neo-Nazi, fascist, insufficiently progressive, or all of the above—and then attack verbally and even physically. I reached out to a decidedly progressive faculty member who was being eviscerated unjustly—scorn, hate mail, the whole enchilada. I’ve done this many times simply to let them know they’re not alone. When I noted the irony that it was coming from the left, they responded:
“The harsh criticism on my role in the story (as reported by the media) is not coming from folks on the left, it’s coming from liberals. There’s a big difference, as you know.”
What a fascinating response. As I understood it, liberals were compassionate and tolerant, albeit a little rich in fanciful ideas. The graphic in Figure 55 shows that everything has changed.ref 763 As your political opponents move to the extreme, you move to the other extreme. We were OK in 2004, quite healthy actually. By 2017, however, we had polarized.
Figure 55. The growing political and social divide.
“War is when your government tells you who your enemy is, and revolution is when you discover it for yourselves.”
When the riots in France started, they were reputed to be about an energy tax. You would be shocked at the number of journalists and bloggers trolling Twitter trying to find someone who could explain what was really happening. Here is my answer: Government is like a fiat currency. Once faith in it is lost, you will witness cascading failures that are too complex to comprehend in detail. Arab Spring began when one highly flammable Tunisian lit himself on fire. As Billy Joel says, “We didn’t start the fire.” Avalanches, explosions, earthquakes, and fires all thwart serious efforts to model them. Metastable systems—systems displaced markedly from equilibrium waiting for the right spark or trigger—return to equilibrium unexpectedly, quickly, and often violently. Social movements start small (by definition) and unexpectedly, but they move quickly and can end violently. France has been down this path. Edmund Burke was one of the few who saw the social movement in late eighteenth-century France as the first rumblings of a murderous rebellion. The Rodney King–sparked LA riots started to spread; we got lucky when they burned out. When everyone is grumpy and some guy decides to light a car on fire, don’t be surprised when others join in. They all share a common denominator: they're PO’d.
“The collapse is fundamentally due to the unstable position; the instantaneous cause of the crash is secondary.”
Didier Sornette, Professor of Entreprenurial Risks, ETH Zurich
The solution is to have strong social institutions and social capital that unifies the populace. This gets to my criticism of the left, not the people but rather the leaders and power brokers denounced by Malcolm X (above). When you deem it your job and derive power from providing goods and services to the masses, self-governing and self-sufficient groups represent risk. It’s a turf war. Under the guise of inclusion, people are now being discouraged from self-assembly. Men and women as well as boys and girls are not allowed to have their own sports. The Boy Scouts of America, where fathers and sons congregated to train and civilize a new generation of responsible fathers, is no longer just fathers and their sons.
Fraternities are an interesting case study in social cohesion. They are on the lam from society. You house a few dozen 18- to 22-year-old men away from their parents for the first time. A few mishaps are a certainty. Statistically, if you select a few dozen men from a campus randomly, give them a Greek label, and monitor their behavior they will collectively look like a dumpster fire. I will admit there is also groupthink that amplifies behavior and drops average IQs to levels that can shock adults. They also represent legal bull’s-eyes for lawyers when things go bad. Some universities have replaced fraternities with communal living units. Why do other schools support this increasingly polarizing Greek communal system? First, the nouveau communal units are not as cohesive as those that are self-assembled. I have a data-less theory: If universities analyzed suicides on campuses—they are common on all campuses because of the risky age bracket—they would find that the suicide rate in fraternities is low. When things go poorly—a flunked exam or being dumped by a girlfriend—the dejected kid goes back to his fraternity and gets shitfaced with dozens of his friends. It is a support group unlike any others (except for maybe in the military). From these collectives of incorrigible crazies emerge future leaders, not only of corporate America but also of university alumni organizations. I am stunned by what the Bands of Losers I lived with turned into as they got older. During reunions, fraternities fill with old friends sharing common stories—stories that are common even if they didn’t overlap in college—while independents wander the campus looking at new buildings or don’t bother to return at all. Are these really organizations you want to dismantle?
Let’s swing our gaze elsewhere for a moment. I always viewed gentrification of dilapidated neighborhoods in big cities as a rebirth of sorts, a spontaneous urban renewal. Out with the old, in with the new. I recently stayed with a friend (Andy Huszar) in Harlem. My life expectancy would have been 5 minutes when I was in grad school. What a miracle. What I failed to realize, however, was that those dilapidated buildings were part of neighborhoods, not just dwellings. Neighborhoods are like Cheers where “everybody knows your name.” Gentrification forces people to find cheaper housing elsewhere. They will find it, of course, but they won’t find a community. You can hear the fabric tearing.
"We live in a society of decreasing circles. More and more of us know fewer and fewer of us. We live alone and eat by ourselves, often with a TV or computer rather than a human being for company."
~The American Conservative (@amconmag)
Now I will go where no rational man has gone before: religion! I have been a pro-choice atheist my whole life—just a pagan with a busy sword—and am unlikely to switch sides now. As a scientist, extreme Christian views on creation and evolution are never gonna make sense. Over the years, however, my thinking became more nuanced as an accumulated broader historical perspective caused cognitive dissonance to encroach. The Church in medieval Europe certainly has plenty of blotches on its record, but in a “World Lit Only by Fire,” the church brought order where there would have been only chaos. Vivid imagery of Hell that made medieval life look cushy by comparison kept the nobles from abusing the peasants. How about the Spanish Inquisition? Well, they were legally trained well above the norm of their time. A documentary on the massive "inquisitor archives" showed that the inquisitors executed fewer people over four centuries than the state of Texas offed over a far shorter span. There is also evidence that the inquisitors viewed religion as outside of their jurisdiction during some periods. Why the bad rap? Every time Spain got into a war, which was quite often, the opposing team would pull out horrific tales of the inquisitors to rally the troops. Also, the norms for the era were pretty damned bad anyway (see Pinker in "Books").
How about all the scientists that got oppressed by the Church? A little history of science shows that gets a little fuzzy too. Leonardo da Vinci carved up people in the basement like John Wayne Gacy without getting flack. When scientists discovered something new, the Church would often say, “God is even more grand than even we realized.” A savvy scientist would say, “You betcha, Pope.” The scientists who got into trouble may have lacked the self-control to avoid pushing the Church’s buttons. I know enough scientists like this to say that my thesis is in the realm of possibility.
“Defending rights against the encroachments of the government saves the common liberties of the country.”
~Alexis de Tocqueville, 18th century French diplomat, historian, and political scientist
When Alexis de Tocqueville came to America, he marveled at how much freedom Americans enjoyed and how religious they were. He also marveled at the lack of lawlessness (brawling aside, which he noted was way too consensual). The message was that our strong Constitution and limited laws gave us unprecedented freedom while religion gave us the will not to abuse it. You resisted stealing from your neighbor simply because it was wrong. You helped your neighbor because it was right. Charles Murray in Coming Apart (see "Books") paints in graphic detail how the last half-century has witnessed a stunningly abrupt replacement of morality for rules. What happens when we have lots of rules but nobody feels morally obliged to follow them?
From the left there is a relentless push to remove Christmas from schools, denounce those who support the American flag, control what is taught to children and where, emasculate men, move decisions from the local to the centralized national government through rules and regulations, take away our freedom of choice with whom to do business, confuse abstract feminism with women's rights, take away parents' rights to choose what is best for their children, and decide with whom we can affiliate and who we get to exclude. These institutions and ideas represent a critical social glue. Be careful what you take away.
Thus, I am an atheist living in a unique society that was built on strong moral values that find their roots, at least in part, in religious convictions that I do not share in their detail. I should be very careful, however, to not lose sight of the fact that I am reaping what I did not sow. I should have more faith in those who already have faith. I am now a cognitive dissident. And with that, my work here is done. You're welcome.
“Maybe our favorite quotations say more about us than about the stories and people we're quoting.”
~John Green (who?)
There are so many people from the world of finance and markets who patiently allow me to invade their space with inane comments and questions. Many are household names—real legends—even outside of the finance world. One year I tried to thank a ton and found out how many more I excluded. As The Donald would say, “I love all of you” (but Rudy, you are the best. I love ya, man.) That said, people do reach out, and I’m happy to chew some fat. My email is
There are always new additions. That’s Sean in the middle sleeping on Grandpa, Miles on the left, and Liam on the right in the photo on the left. Sean’s a boy until he’s old enough to decide for himself. In the right-hand photo is Claire, a rescue from a breeder. This picture is after we peeled 25 pounds off her. She identifies as a Lab, our third, although similarities to bear #409 (Beadnose) are inescapable.
Figure 56. Three punks in training and The Master (left) and “Claire” aka “Claire the Bear” aka “The Tank” aka “Butterball” and The Master of that too (right).
“Moses wrote one book. Then what did he do?”
~Sidney Morgenbesser, Columbia University philosopher
I would have read more books when I was younger if the ones they made us read didn't suck salty balls and if it were not for acute CLCS (chronic lip cramping syndrome). I was a typical boy on the lower end of the reading scale with a highly targeted curriculum:
As an adult, career and family have kept my reading list short (outside of volumes on chemistry). Enter the audiobook. Snobs say it’s not reading, to which I say, “Bite me." I use my ears; you use your eyes. Hellen Keller used her damn fingers. I can get through a dozen per year just commuting a 24-minute round trip to work. When my wife asks me to go to the store, it's like asking me to read for a few minutes. And even if the books are mediocre—I try to be selective—they just keep marching forward monotonously to the finish. I have failed to finish very few (no fading Post-its). I burn them to disk for $10 a pop via Amazon Prime so that my colleagues can mooch them. The books all profess to be non-fiction, although I have my doubts sometimes. Topics include history, markets, economics, science, psychology, anthropology, and college-level courses from the Teaching Company. I’m trying to get through American history through the eyes of presidential biographers (even with Chester Arthur in my sights). Simple treatises on complex topics (like Mervyn King’s latest below) show me how to formulate and articulate complex ideas simply.
The Fifth Risk by Michael Lewis
Those who hate books that are one-third book and two-thirds fluff should appreciate Michael Lewis for brevity. Lewis’s treatise blends several plotlines without bringing much of his typical comedic flare. The primary plotline is to hammer Donald Trump for his poor transition in taking over the federal government. Some of the loons Trump put in key staff positions do indeed seem to be inexcusable. I think Lewis does a credible job, although it seems a little light on awareness that (a) Trump had no clue that he would win, and (b) his transition team had support from neither political machine. The second, dominant plot is to describe some of the amazing things federal employees do that we haven’t a clue about. He does this well, although he again glosses over the estimated 2 million federal employees who are not brimming with skill and productivity. The book was informative.
Coming Apart: The State of White America, 1960–2010 by Charles Murray
Stan Druckenmiller said that Charles Murray’s book “scared the hell out of me.” Murray, you may recall, is the putative alt-right whackadoodle who wrote The Bell Curve and was physically attacked at Middlebury College in 2017. I would be hard pressed to pigeonhole this book as leaning to the right. It is a great story about how the fabric of social structure is fraying badly. We’ve replaced morality and a sense of social cohesiveness with a far less effective rule- and law-based society. It’s an important book. (Jonah Goldberg admitted to me that his newest book channels Murray’s, albeit dripping with sarcasm. It’s on my list.)
The Intimidation Game: How the Left Is Silencing Free Speech by Kimberley Strassel (@KimStrassel)
Kimberley Strassel is no friend of the left, so it’s not a surprise that she would focus on the evil deeds of only left-wing politicians. She does a credible job of laying out the political hijinks, which are decidedly disquieting. The emphasis is on how they use government and law as a weapon against the right. If one were to assume the right wing is equally guilty, you probably get an accurate view of how awful politics inside the Beltway has become. It was too lopsided for me to endorse it enthusiastically.
Antifragile: Things That Gain from Disorder by Nassim Taleb (@nntaleb)
To the list of terms “fragile” (easily broken) and “robust” (hard to break), Nassim Taleb suggests the term “antifragile” (grows more durable under stress). The most obvious and intuitive example is the immune system. Taleb venomously attacks those he disrespects (economists), and his prose is an acquired taste. Many will find the vitriol too much. He makes interesting arguments about how our efforts to protect ideas, objects, people, and institutions inadvertently weaken them. He reinforces maxims like “stability breeds instability” or “that which does not kill us makes us stronger.”
Skin in the Game: Hidden Asymmetries in Daily Life by Nassim Taleb (@nntaleb)
Nassim Taleb tees off on those in our world who get to call the shots and reap rewards but do not pay the price of failure. This heap of targets includes politicians, economists, and bankers. One of his strong supporters over at Amazon referred to Taleb as "rude and angry". Detractors hold a mirror up to him and ask if his disdain for advice givers isn’t some form of hypocrisy. As always, I enjoy reading his books, but bring a thick (antifragile) skin.
The Four: The Hidden DNA of Amazon, Apple, Facebook, and Google by Scott Galloway (@profgalloway)
Scott Galloway is an entrepreneur, venture capitalist, and New York University professor. He knows his way around the tech world. In this book he critiques the FAANGs (ex-Netflix). Although it seems to be intended as a tell-all description of the dastardly deeds of these monopolistic, civil-liberty-encroaching companies, he cannot hide his awe. Clearly Amazon is at the top of his leaderboard as a completely mind bending and society-changing wielder of unchecked power. Apple is praised for marketing itself as a well-branded provider of elite products. (I was left unconvinced of its durability.) Facebook and Google draw fire for their powerful incursions into our daily lives. I am unconvinced that any of them are as durable as Galloway thinks. The backlash to their power may be surprising. I only wish I had this book 15 years ago; I would have made a killing as a true-believing investor.
The Coddling of the American Mind: How Good Intentions and Bad Ideas Are Setting Up a Generation for Failure by Jonathan Haidt (@JonHaidt) and Greg Lukianoff
Jonathan Haidt and Greg Lukianoff are evolutionary psychologists at the vanguard of the fight to push back against political correctness and the strange form of social activism that appeared abruptly on campuses around 2014 (and, I hasten to add, graduate programs around 2018). He is openly liberal while claiming that he no longer recognizes what is called liberalism in this era. The book describes in lurid detail what is happening, how it happened, and its profound consequences. If you’re the parent of young children, you should read it before it’s too late for your kids. Great book. I sent it to one of our deans, and he said that what Haidt describes is what he deals with every day, and it has caused him to rethink his child-rearing tactics.
The Marshall Plan: Dawn of the Cold War by Benn Steil (@BennSteil)
I read this book twice, the first time in draft form while it was being written and the second in audiobook form after publication. Benn Steil is a bestselling author hailing from the Council on Foreign Relations (CFR) which gives him a remarkable view of the world and access to unparalleled human resources. After piecing together how John Maynard Keynes and Harry Dexter White negotiated the new global currency order in his bestselling, Battle of Bretton Woods, Steil charges into the task of probing the political machinations required to establish the global political order. He describes in scholarly detail (read: not for the faint of heart) how the Russians and the U.S. went headlong into the Cold War. The Marshall Plan to save Europe from imploding in the post-war era was politics on steroids—less humanitarian and more global positioning. The politics within the U.S. and Europe were as complex as any. What I still have not grasped, however, is why West Berlin, deeply embedded in the Eastern Bloc, was so important.
12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos by Jordan B. Peterson (@jordanbpeterson)
Jordan Peterson has had a growing presence in the culture wars. He came to prominence fighting a Canadian law that would mandate the use of pronouns for all the gender fence sitters. Peterson then rocketed to fame after a series of interviews with liberal attackers (notably Cathy Newman) in which he systematically dismembered their ideas. (I watch his interviews as though they were game films.) This book describes a series of guidelines on how to live your life and raise your children to avoid becoming insufferable with insufferable children. The lessons are sound. The book is a good read that would have died in obscurity if not for his rise to fame, which has led to millions of copies sold. Cathy Newman made him wealthy.
The Undoing Project: A Friendship That Changed Our Minds by Michael Lewis
At some level, this book is a recycling of ideas of Michael Lewis’s Moneyball (the book, not the movie!) and Daniel Kahneman’s Thinking Fast and Slow, both of which are brilliant books. Lewis goes into considerable depth describing how Danny Kahneman and Amos Tversky worked as “the odd couple” for many years to create the ideas underlying Thinking Fast and Slow, which won Kahneman the pseudo Nobel Prize in economics. The Undoing Project is about the two men. In my opinion, this book will likely lose a lot of appeal for readers who are unfamiliar with Kahneman’s and Tversky’s work. Thus, read Thinking Fast and Slow and Moneyball first, then decide about The Undoing Project.
The Better Angels of Our Nature: Why Violence Has Declined by Steven Pinker (@sapinker)
Pinker wrote what could have been titled, The Comprehensive History of Violence. It covers all facets from crimes, brutal punishments, wars, domestic violence, you name it. Steven Pinker makes a strong case that we have become less violent over the centuries. He deals with those who point out atrocities of the twentieth century by invoking a per-capita metric and describing hugely violent periods that are largely unknown to most of us. The horrific stats on violence in the past are sobering, occassionally forcing me to take breaks during the more gruesome parts. To paraphrase Pinker, “I could have Adolf Hitler standing in front of me, and I would not have thought of doing that to him.” The book could have been shorter, but it certainly is enlightening and serious scholarship.
Red Notice: A True Story of High Finance, Murder and One Man’s Fight for Justice by Bill Browder (@Billbrowder)
I ran across Bill Browder ever so briefly last year as I wrote about the Magnitsky case in which the U.S. put sanctions on Russia for torturing Sergei Magnitsky to death. This affair got tangled up in the Clinton–Russia dealings. Browder describes his efforts at dealing with Russian oligarchs as he was an early entrant to Russia after the fall of the Soviet empire. You can’t help but notice that Browder is very much like the oligarchs he describes, strip mining Russia of assets on sale in the post-empire chaos. After reading the book, I began to run into bloggers who view Browder in a much darker light and paint him as the true villain. I am altogether uncertain about where fact and fiction meet in this book.
The Selfish Gene by Richard Dawkins (@RichardDawkins)
This 1970s classic describes how evolution works at the gene level rather than the group level. (This book was a natural choice for me as a former genetics major with a fondness for evolution and various nature–nurture battles.) Dawkins’s gene-level evolution was pushed so strongly that it stifled contrary theories—group-level natural selection—to the point that it took decades for them to re-emerge and eventually usurp Dawkins’ model. The book is a little dated, but I enjoyed it. His most lasting legacy is the idea that humans pass along non-gene-level information (ideas) through cultural evolution. He called these ideas “memes.” And now you know the rest of the story.
The Intelligent Investor: The Definitive Book on Value Investing. A Book of Practical Counsel (Revised Edition) by Benjamin Graham, Jason Zweig (@jasonzweigwsj), and Warren E. Buffett
This, folks, is the bible of investing. Graham was Warren Buffett’s mentor. This revised edition has updates from Zweig and Buffett, but it seems faithful to Graham’s original edition, which I read so many years ago that I had no idea of its importance and wisdom. Modern investors who read this will say either, “OMFG!” because they understand its importance or, “This thinking blows” because they’re still swilling new-era Kool-Aid. The book convinced me that I should probably never buy a common stock unless I am willing to throw a Hail Mary because I could not possibly do the analysis adequate enough to be called an “intelligent investor.” My best hope is to go for sectors. On the battle of stocks versus bonds, I was struck by the claim that people who think they will necessarily make more money in stocks than in bonds in the long run are “delusional.” Debunking this belief has been my white whale for a couple of years. I think the authors are correct, but the era of interventionist (arrogant) central banking has made their maxim seem wrong for a good long time. This book is a must read for those who think they are hotshot investors. Dismiss their wisdom at your peril.
The End of Alchemy: Money, Banking, and the Future of the Global Economy by Mervyn King
Mervyn King's view of the financial crisis and monetary policy on both sides of the crisis is either precious—he is the former head of the Bank of England—or garbage, because he is one of “them.” Maybe he’s just trying to salvage his legacy, but King is remarkably critical of central banking and monetary policy. He knows that consumption is unsustainably high, and it cannot be solved with stimulus. That game is over. The level of the book is low—I think I could have written much if not all of it—but this level of “honesty” from one of the global elite is shocking. They way he articulates ideas with clarity makes the book highly entertaining.
Hoover: An Extraordinary Life in Extraordinary Times by Kenneth Whyte
I’m attempting to complete a history of the United States through the eyes of presidential biographers. Hoover was a natural given that he was POTUS during an economically disastrous four-year term. There are many myths propagated by Hoover owing to this little bit of bad timing that came to a head with Roosevelt beating him like a rented mule in the 1932 election. In a nutshell, Hoover was extraordinarily qualified as a businessman and, when called to service, a focused and highly competent civil servant. The guy got the job done. He has been vilified because of a largely erroneous role played during the Great Depression and because Roosevelt was a dick. Hoover saw it coming, spotted the metastability of the credit and stock markets, and sweated the details. He did everything in his power to mitigate the damage, stopping short of big-government solutions. He also didn’t pander to the masses for love or votes, which carried with it a high price politically. I was left with the sense that Hoover was one of the greats.
Sapiens: A Brief History of Humankind by Yuval Noah Harari and Derek Perkins
I mowed through two books by Yuval Noah Harari and Derek Perkins that seem to ponder the meaning of life. Sapiens got the bulk of the press. The book wanders through the cultural evolution that led from hunter-gatherers to what we are today. One of the more interesting concepts is that you would have trouble arguing life got better until we reached the era of modern medicine. We merely got better at packing more people into tight places. I have this odd paradox: I enjoyed wandering through the story but within a matter of months could not for the life of me tell you what it was about. Some books are sticky: The ideas stay with you. This one was not of those for me (a little like a pleasant dream that leaves your memory moments after waking). One Amazon reviewer possibly caught the spirit of my concerns noting, “Rather than being the interesting synthesis I’d hoped for, this turned out to be a series of disjointed bits touching on nearly every aspect of society.”
Homo Deus: A Brief History of Tomorrow by Yuval Noah Harari and Derek Perkins
As the sequel to Sapiens, it suffers from the same disconnected wandering through a stream-of-consciousness presentation of entertaining ideas. Once again, I enjoyed it like one might enjoy listening to a symphony, but in the end, the notes blur together. One hopes that part of this disappointing lack of stickiness is merely how the human mind indexes information. Maybe the ideas are in in my skull—part of my cultural DNA—but only retrievable when a cue from the environment resurrects them, allowing me to molest somebody with my globality.
The Oxford Dictionary of Allusions by Andrew Delahunty
An allusion is “an expression designed to call something to mind without mentioning it explicitly; an indirect or passing reference.” There you have it. I worked my way through a book of allusions for fun. Most aren’t that good, but I hit a couple of gems. The book is not for Philistines. (Did you catch that allusion?)
The Myth of Capitalism: Monopolies and the Death of Competition by Jonathan Tepper
I read only a handful of draft chapters while this book was being written. Based on that foreshadowing, I suspect the overall message—oligopolies, not just monopolies, are destroying capitalism—will be a compelling story. I'll let you know a year from now.