Don't let them steal your milk money

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Phil Williams
Status: Silver Member (Offline)
Joined: Oct 14 2009
Posts: 240
Don't let them steal your milk money

Funny...but kinda sad too.

A friend of mine posted the above on facebook. He is a Republican, so I couldn't resist posting the following as a response.

Republicans- You have two cows and you take all your milk money and the milk money of every American and unborn Americans for the next 100 years and spend it on drones, missiles, and overpriced toilet seats. Meanwhile the democrats take that same milk money and spend it on drugs & overpriced health care. In public the Republicans criticize the Democrats as milk money wasting welfare queen socialists, and the Democrats criticize the Republicans for being milk money wasting war mongering fascists. Of course behind closed doors they congratulate each other for keeping the farmers distracted and fighting amongst each other, while they take all the milk money.

Then the farmers wake up. The farmers get tired of giving their milk money to people who use their milk money to make sure they are scared and continue to give up their milk money forever. So the farmers stop giving up their milk money. So the FRS (farmer’s revenue service) puts a lot of farmers in jail. The Republicans and Democrats try to get more milk money by raising the milk money quota, but it doesn’t give them more milk money! They become angry, so they take all the saved up milk that is stored in the farmer’s 401 milk plans.

The Gov’t spends all the 401 milk money in only two years, so they decide to make owning cows illegal. All the farmers have to turn their cows into the Gov’t, especially the high capacity cows. The only problem is the Gov’t doesn’t like to do work, and milking cows is a lot of work. So they decide to call up the Dept. of Milkland Security. They tell Milkland Security to put to good use those billion rounds of hollow point ammunition they bought with milk money. So they shoot all the cows with hollow points, and the best part is they still have plenty left-over for the farmers, I mean terrorists, not farmers, terrorists. I repeat terrorists!!!! The best part about killing all the cows is that all the sudden they have meat, and lots of it. So they sell all their meat to China, and they are literally swimming in meat money.

The Gov’t spends like never before. They buy whatever they want whenever they want it. Then one day they run out of meat money, so they tax the farmers again, but they have no milk money because the cows are dead. They ask the Chinese for a meat money advance. The Chinese refuse knowing they will never get their meat money back. So the Gov’t goes to Iraq, Afghanistan, Libya, Syria, and Iran to take their milk money. And these places have the best milk of all! They have chocolate milk! This milk is extra special! One gallon of this milk can do the work of 1000 men.

Eventually, after taking everyone’s regular milk and chocolate milk, they run out. The problem is that the Gov’t does not know how to live without lots and lots of milk. So the farmers go back to work but they keep what little milk they have, and they trade milk with other farmers, and nobody dares give milk to the Government again. The farmers no longer care about the Government. They realized that without their milk, the government could not exist.

Travlin's picture
Travlin
Status: Diamond Member (Offline)
Joined: Apr 15 2010
Posts: 1322
Nicely done

Phil

This was nicely done.  I love the way you use humor to make your points.

Travlin 

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Phil Williams
Status: Silver Member (Offline)
Joined: Oct 14 2009
Posts: 240
Thanks Travlin

Thanks Travlin, I'm glad you enjoyed it. I was telling my wife as I was writing this, how annoyed I get at the propaganda that gets deciminated by Republicans and Democrats, but it is impossible to get through to anyone. I have to hand it to them, divide and conquer works great!

My wife always asks, "Why do you care?" 

My answer is always, "Because it annoys the hell out of me!"

Of course if I really think about it, there is more to it. At one point I was well respected amongst my friends and family. I began waking up in 2006', and really started making serious changes in my life in 2007'. Of course I did what most people do when they come across life changing information. I told everyone I knew. I of course expected the same response that I had when faced with these things, but I was dismayed that I was mostly faced with denial, apathy, and downright hostility. Granted I was terrible at it, making all the mistakes, not thinking of the emotional side at all.

I've lost some friends, a few family members, and a lot of respect over this. Last Christmas, my wife's uncle was telling me that everyone thought I would be in my bunker for the Mayan Apocalypse. We don't have a bunker of course, but I would love to have one! So, I try to keep my mouth shut for the most part now, except when I can't help myself. This stuff really annoys me because I put myself out there to help the people I care about and now it gets shoved back into my face.

The stock markets doing great! We have a thousand years of shale gas! We're going to be a bigger oil producer than Saudi Arabia! They will come up with something! Vote for this guy, he will save us! No vote for that guy, he's going to save us! You get the point, it pisses me off!

ao's picture
ao
Status: Diamond Member (Offline)
Joined: Feb 4 2009
Posts: 2220
Phil Williams wrote: Thanks

Phil Williams wrote:

Thanks Travlin, I'm glad you enjoyed it. I was telling my wife as I was writing this, how annoyed I get at the propaganda that gets deciminated by Republicans and Democrats, but it is impossible to get through to anyone. I have to hand it to them, divide and conquer works great!

My wife always asks, "Why do you care?" 

My answer is always, "Because it annoys the hell out of me!"

You get the point, it pisses me off!

LOL.  I'm laughing because that's not too different from my story ... it pisses me off.  I second Travlin ... great post.

Phil Williams's picture
Phil Williams
Status: Silver Member (Offline)
Joined: Oct 14 2009
Posts: 240
AO

I'm glad I'm not the only one. BTW, I've enjoyed many of your posts over the years. Thanks.

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